Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
One Friday morning, a teacher came up with a novel way to motivate her class. She told them that she would read a quote and the first student to correctly identify who said it would receive the rest of the day off. She started with “This was England’s finest hour.” Little Suzy instantly jumped up and said,” Winston Churchill.” “Congratulations said the teacher you may go home.” The teacher then said, “Ask not what your country can do for you…”…
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DATING: The process of spending enormous amounts of time, money, and effort to get better acquainted with a person whom you don’t especially like at present and will learn to lake a lot less in the future. EASY: A term used to describe a woman who has the morals of a man. EYE CONTACT: A method utilized by a single woman to communicate to a man that she is interested in him. Despite being advised to do so, many women…
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God’s Human DNA Code For many years molecular biologists have been mystified by the fact that very little of an organism’s DNA seems to serve any useful function. I have solved the mystery. The reason why only 30% of human DNA performs any useful function is that the rest of it is comments. Once we decode a typical human genome, we see that the contents begin as follows: ===/* HUMAN_DNA.H * * Human Genome * Version 2.1 * * (C)…
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A man at a bar gets really drunk. Some guys decide to be good Samaritans and get him home. So they pick him up off the floor drag him out the door. On the way to the car, he falls three times. When they to the house, they help him out of the car and he falls down four more times. They ring the bell, and one says, “Here’s your husband, missus.” The man’s wife says, “Where the hell is…
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One thing that has always bugged me is to sit down at the dinner table only to be interrupted by a phone call from a telemarketer. I decided, on one such occasion, to try to be as irritating as they were to me. The call was from AT&T and it went something like this: Me: Hello? AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T… Me: Is this AT&T? AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T… Me: This is AT&T? AT&T: Yes This is AT&T… Me:…
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A teacher is talking to her class full of infants. “If your mother was a bird, what sort would she be?” she asks the children. The first child says, “If my mummy was a bird, she’d be a dove.” “That’s nice,” said the teacher, “why’s that?” “Because she’s beautiful and pure and reminds me of a dove,” says the little boy. “If my mummy was a bird, she’d be a stork,” says the second boy. “Oh and why’s that?” says…
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1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well-lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils. 2. Read over the assignment carefully, to make certain you understand it. 3. Walk down to the vending machines and buy some coffee to help you concentrate. 4. Stop off at the third floor on the way back and visit with your friend from class. If your friend hasn’t yet started the paper either, you can both walk to McDonalds and buy a…
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SO BIG Yo mama’s so big, that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step. Yo mama’s so big, her belly button’s got an echo. Yo mama’s so big, she can’t wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back. Yo mama’s so big, she rollerskates on busses. Yo mama’s so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers. Yo mama’s so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker. Yo mama’s so big, she uses bowling…
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George W. Bush, in an airport lobby, noticed a man in a long, flowing, white robe with a long, flowing, white beard and flowing, white hair. The man had a staff in one hand and some stone tablets under the other arm. George W. approached the man and inquired, “Aren’t you Moses?” The man ignored George W. and stared at the ceiling. George W. positioned himself more directly in the man’s view and asked again, “Aren’t you Moses?” The man…
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1. Everyone used to joke about a Starbucks on every corner, and now there is a Starbucks on every corner. 2. People mark December 31st on their calendar as “The End of the World.” 3. Gen-Xers trade their futons in for orthopedic support mattresses. 4. You realize a big family is inefficient and decide to downsize. 5. HBO introduces it’s new channel: HBO Pi – The channel that never repeats. 6. Movie promos brag, “Funniest Movie of the Millenium.” 7.…
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