Poor girl Jokes - page 2

Bill Gates, you lose!

Bill Gates dies and goes to hell. Satan greets him: “Welcome Mr Gates, we’ve been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You’ve been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. I’ll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you’ll be locked up forever.” Satan takes Bill to a huge lake of fire in which millions of poor souls are tormented and tortured. He then takes him to a…

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Screw Chainletters

Hello, my name is Jonathan McKenzie. I am suffering from rare and deadly diseases, poor scores on final exams, fear of being kidnapped and executed by anal electrocution, and guilt for not forwarding out 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, then that poor 6 year old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before…

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George Washington

DID YOU EVER HEAR THE EXPRESSION: YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING? THIS IS HOW IT ORIGINATED: George Washington was traveling with his troops at Valley Forge. They were cold, hungry and tired. One of the soldiers asks General Washington when they can stop to get some food and rest. Washington tells them he’ll stop at the next house he sees. At the house, he knocks on the door and asks the lady if she can give his men food and…

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More Redneck Etiquette

When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of way. Never tow another car using pantyhose and duct tape. When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer. Never relieve yourself from a moving vehicle, especially when driving. Do not remove the seats from the car so that all your kids can fit in. Unlike clothes and shoes, a toothbrush should…

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Politically-Correct Little Red Riding Hood

There once was a young person named Little Red Riding Hood who lived on the edge of a large forest full of endangered owls and rare plants that would probably provide a cure for cancer if only someone took the time to study them. Red Riding Hood lived with a nurture giver whom she sometimes referred to as “mother”, although she didn’t mean to imply by this term that she would have thought less of the person if a close…

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