Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
One night I had a wonderous dream, One set of footprints there were seen, the footprints of my precious Lord, but mine were not along the shore, but then some stranger prints appeared, and I asked the Lord, “What have we here? Those prints are too large and round and neat, but Lord they are too big for feet.” “My child,” He said in somber tones, “for miles I carried you alone. I challenged you to walk in faith, but…
(0)
Loading...
This couple are just married and they go to their hotel suite. The groom is really pumped up. It’s his wedding night and he’s finally going to get some. They get to their room and he’s ready to pounce on his bride, having already stripped. She stops him and says she’s starving and would he run down to vending machine and get her a Snickers. He says, “But I’m already naked!” She says “Please I just know that I’ll be…
(1)Loading...
This young man was going golfing one day, but he wasn’t very good. He had been hitting the ball in the rough, the water, and soon a sand trap. By the time he hit the sand trap he was very annoyed. So he stood there swinging at the ball but missing and in the process digging a hole. Soon he hit something hard (not the golf ball). He bent over and dug it up to see what it was. When…
(0)Loading...
Things you shouldn’t say to a cop Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in. And that hooker I met at the AIDS clinic said you were a nice guy. Hey, you must’ve been doin’ about 125mph to keep up with me! Good job! That uniform makes your ass look really big. Excuse me. Is “stick up” hyphenated? I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a Police Officer. You don’t happen…
(1)Loading...
A man makes a suggestion to his wife. “Honey, what do you say that tonight we change positions?” His wife responds with, “Yes, I would really like that! Tonight, you stand by the ironing board, and I’ll lie on the couch and watch TV.”
(0)Loading...
“I’m going fishing.” Really means… “I’m going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.” “Let’s take your car.” Really means…. “Mine is full of beer cans, burger wrappers and completely out of gas.” “Woman driver.” Really means…. “Someone who doesn’t speed, tailgate, swear, make obscene gestures and has a better driving record than me.” “I don’t care what color you paint the kitchen.”…
(0)Loading...
SO BIG Yo mama’s so big, that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step. Yo mama’s so big, her belly button’s got an echo. Yo mama’s so big, she can’t wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back. Yo mama’s so big, she rollerskates on busses. Yo mama’s so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers. Yo mama’s so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker. Yo mama’s so big, she uses bowling…
(1)Loading...
Once a farmer bought a filly horse to bring home and train to race in the horse races. He was unloading the horse from his trailer, when his old stallion got a whiff of the little horse. This caused the stallion to become uncontrollably wild. The stallion wanted to have his way with the filly horse. The farmer knew that this would pose a problem. So he called the vet to see if he might have any sugestions. The vet…
(0)Loading...
It has become pretty obvious to me that our present astrological signs have served their purpose and that we should get rid of them. When I’m out driving around I’ll see bulls, and once in a great while I suppose I’ll even see a ram. Up the street from me there’s some twins, but I don’t see them much. The rest of these things are just too obscure. You only see crabs on vacation. There are no lions, or scorpions,…
(1)Loading...
NEW YORK It is against the law to throw a ball at someone’s head for fun. The penalty for jumping off a building is death. NEW JERSEY You cannot pump your own gas. All gas stations are full service only. In Ocean City, it is against the law to slurp your soup at a restaurant. CALIFORNIA It is illegal to set a mousetrap without a hunting license. Women may not drive in a house coat. FLORIDA It is illegal to…
(0)Loading...