Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A man was sleeping his car on the side of the road one night, until he was awakened by a jogger knocking at his window. He unrolled his window and looked at the jogger. “Excuse me, sir. Do you have the time?” He asked. The man looked at his watch and replied, “It’s 8:10.” The jogger thanked him and went on with his jogging. The man rolled his window back up and went back to sleep. A while later, he…
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Titles of Children’s Books you probably WON’T see! 1.Some Kittens Can Fly 2.That’s it, I’m Putting You Up for Adoption 3.Grandpa Gets a Casket 4.The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator 5.Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia 6.The Kids’ Guide to Hitchhiking 7.Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her 8.Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence 9.All Cats Go to Hell 10.The Little Sissy Who Snitched 11.The Man in the Moon Is Actually Satan 12.Your Nightmares Are Real 13.Where Would You…
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This man came home from work and asked his wife if they could have pork (other white meat) for dinner. The wife said that they are already having chicken and that chicken is better for them. He didn’t want to argue so instead of fighting he settled for chicken. He saw a commercial on t.v for a hypnosis that you can use in someone’s sleep. So every night for the next two weeks he stayed up for 2 hours and…
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The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table, in front of her kids. You’ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws. You think a woman who is “out of your league,” bowls on a different night. Jack Daniels makes your list of “Most Admired People.” You think “Genitalia” is an Italian airline. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.…
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A father put his young son to bed every night, and to make sure he said his prayers, the father waited outside the bedroom door and listened. Each night the boy ended his prayers with “God bless mommy, daddy, the dog and the cat.” One day the cat scratched the little boy and that night he finished his prayers, “God bless mommy, daddy and the dog.” The next morning when the family awoke they found the cat dead. A few…
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A man mentioned to his landlord that the tenants in the apartment above his were being a bit unruly. “Many a night they stomp on the floor and shout till around midnight.” When the landlord asked if it bothered him, he replied, “Not really because I usually stay up and practice my trumpet till about that time most every night, anyway.”
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This couple had been married for about five years, and one day, as they are out working in the yard, the man tells his wife, “Man! Your butt is getting fat!” She gets ticked off and moves to another part of the yard. The husband follows her and says, “You know, looking at that big gas grill over there, I’ll bet your butt is as big as that grill. It’s HUGE!” The wife gets really mad, tells him HE can…
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There was a man whose wife didn’t respond to his desires. This continued for about six months. As frustration built, he decided to see a doctor about his wife’s lack of attention toward him. The doctor gave him a bottle of pills and said, “Now, just before your wife retires, give her a cup of milk and slip a couple of these pills in it. Before you know it, she will be more than obliging.” So he goes home, very…
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1) How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes? Both of them. 2) Why did the man cross the road? He heard the chicken was a slut. 3) Why don’t women blink during foreplay? They don’t have time. 4) Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg? Even at that stage they won’t stop to ask directions. 5) What do men and sperm have in common? They both have…
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A man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandpa in the hospital. “How are you, Grandpa?” he asks. “Feeling fine,” says the old man. “What’s the food like?” “Terrific, wonderful menus.” “And the nursing?” “Just couldn’t be better. These young nurses really take good care of me.” “What about sleeping? Do you sleep OK?” “No problem at all, nine hours solid every night. At 10 o’clock, they bring me a cup of hot chocolate and a Viagra tablet . . .…
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