Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Two vampires wanted to go out to eat, but were having a little trouble deciding where to go. They were a little tired of the locals in Transylvania and wanted something a little more exotic. After some discussion, they decided to go to Italy. So off they went to Italy and ended up in Venice. On a bridge over one of the canals, they hid in the shadows and waited for dinner. A few minutes later, they noticed a young…
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A man is driving home late one night and is feeling very horny. (So, how is this different than any other time a man is driving? — Ray) Anyway, as he is passing a pumpkin patch, his mind starts to wander. He thinks to himself, you know a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there is no one around here for miles. He pulls over to the side of the road, picks out a nice juicy looking pumpkin, cuts…
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Manny is almost 29 years old. His friends have already gotten married, but Manny still just dates and dates. Finally, a friend asks him, “What’s the matter, are you looking for the perfect woman? Are you that particular? Can’t you find anyone who suits you?” “No,” Manny replies. “I meet many nice girls, but as soon as I bring them home to meet my parents, my Mother doesn’t like them. So I keep on looking!” “Listen,” his friend suggests, “Why…
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Mess Test :Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Place a fishstick behind the TV and leave it there all summer. Toy Test: Buy a 55-gallon drum of Lego. (If Lego’s are not available, you may substitute roofing tacks.) Have a friend spread them all over the house and stairways. Put on a blindfold and remove your shoes and socks. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream, as this could wake the child at night.…
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ARTIFICIAL INSEMINATION: Procreation without recreation. BOOKCASE: A piece of furniture used in America to house bowling trophies and Elvis collectibles. BULIMIA: Retched excess. CHIC: Considered smart without the deadening implication of intelligence. CLIQUE: A group of insiders who greet outsiders with their backsides; a closed circle of asses. CONSULTANT: A jobless person who shows executives how to work. DENTURES: Two rows of artificial ivories that may be removed periodically to frighten one’s grandchildren or provide accompaniment to Spanish music. DNA:…
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Barbie’s Letter To Santa: Dear Santa: Listen, you fat little troll, I’ve been helping you out every year, playing at being the perfect Christmas Present, wearing skimpy bathing suits in frigid weather, and drowning in fake tea from one too many tea parties, and I hate to break it to ya Santa, but IT’S DEFINITELY PAY BACK TIME! There had better be some changes around here this Christmas, or I’m gonna call for a nationwide meltdown (and trust me, you…
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Lee Trevino just finished golfing and went to the 19th hole for a drink. He sits down at the bar next to a rather attractive woman. After a few sips, he looks to the lady and noticing how lovely she is, starts talking to her. Soon, they end up in his hotel room, and are having a rather nice time in bed. After they finish, Lee gets out of bed and walks over to the phone and picks it up.…
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