Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A woman gets home, runs into her house, slams the door and shouts, “Honey, pack your bags. I just won the lottery!” The husband says, “Wow! That’s great! Should I pack for the ocean, or should I pack for the mountains?” She says, “I don’t care. Just get the hell out.”
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A man decides to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and is very satisfied with the results. One day he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper. Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?” “About 35,” he replies. “I’m actually 47!” the man says, feeling happy. After that he goes into McDonald’s for lunch, and asks the server the…
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A man is out in the wilderness and he’s hopelessly lost. It’s been nearly three weeks since he’s eaten anything besides what he could forage and he’s been reduced to sleeping in caves and under trees. One afternoon he comes upon an old mansion in the woods. It has vines covering most of it and the man can’t see any other buildings in the area. However, he sees smoke coming out of the chimney implying someone is home. He knocks…
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The Reverend John Fuzz was pastor of a small congregation in a little Pennsylvania town. One day he was walking down Main Street and he happened to notice a female member of his congregation sitting in the town bar, drinking beer. The reverend thought this was sinful and not something a member of his congregation should do, so he walked through the open door of the bar and sat down next to the woman. “Mrs. Fitzgerald,” the reverend said sternly.…
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At this pharmacy, a blonde woman asked to use the infant scale to weigh the baby she was holding. The clerk explained that it was out for repairs, but said that she would figure the infant’s weight by weighing the woman and baby together on the adult scale, then weighing the mother alone and subtracting the second amount from the first. “It won’t work,” countered the blonde. “Why not?” asked the clerk. “I’m not the mother; I’m the aunt.”
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Upon graduation from high school in a very rural area, young John was to be escorted to “the big city” by ma and pa to scout out the location of the college he would be attending next year. Ma and Pa had never been to “the big city” either, but they were sure that they would be able to safely excort their precious son and help to answer any questions he might have-since everything in “the big city” would be…
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While my wife and I were shopping at a mall kiosk, a shapely young woman in a short, form-fitting dress strolled by. My eyes followed her. Without looking up from the item she was examining, my wife asked, “Was it worth the trouble you’re in?”
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One night, two drunken men met in a bar. They quickly became friends and one of them invited everyone in the bar to continue the party at his house. When they arrived at the door of the house, his new friend said: “But… This is my house!” “What?” said the other. “Yes, I live here!” “But it’s impossible!” “Well, we’ll settle this… we’ll both go up and ring the doorbell, and whoever answers the door will tell us who lives…
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A blonde woman goes to see her Podiatrist. She says, “Doc, I just got back from a few weeks in the Bahamas, and the weather was so great that I spent most of the days just lying on the sand. But the strangest thing happened. Whenever a good-looking guy came by, I would get this strange tingling sensation between my toes.” The podiatrist thought this was kind of unusual and examined her. He asked her if she had this sensation…
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A boy was sitting on his front steps one day, holding a bottle of turpentine. His father had told him to stay away from it, that it was Powerful liquid. He couldn’t resist and had experimented with it all afternoon. The boy was deep in thought, when on the sidewalk, a Priest happened to be walking by. “What do you have there, son?” the priest asked. The boy replied, “I got the most powerful liquid in the world in this…
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