Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Two atoms were walking down the street the other day when they bumped into each other. “Ow, that hurts,” said the first atom. “Oh, I’m sorry,” the second atom apologized. “Are you okay?” “I think so,” replied the first atom. “But I lost a neutron!” “Are you sure?” asked the second atom. The first atom said, “I’m positive!”
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Little Billy is a neighor of Ms. Jones & concerned about her dog getting out — Little Billy runs up to Ms. Jone’s door, “Ms. Jones, Ms. Jones, your dog is out!” Ms. Jones replies, “That’s o.k. Billy, I let him out. He is eating grass ’cause he has gas.” Well…the next day Billy sees Ms. Jones dog is out, Billy runs to her door, “Ms. Jones, Ms. Jones your dog is out!” “I know Billy, he has gas &…
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“I don’t want nations feeling like that they can bully ourselves and our allies. I want to have a ballistic defense system so that we can make the world more peaceful, and at the same time I want to reduce our own nuclear capacities to the level commiserate with keeping the peace.” ?Des Moines, Iowa, Oct. 23, 2000 “Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream.”?LaCrosse, Wis., Oct. 18, 2000 “If I’m the president, we’re going to…
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10. Have you looked through her briefs? 9. He is one hard judge! 8. Counselor, let’s do it in chambers. 7. His attorney withdrew at the last minute. 6. Is it a penal offense? 5. Better leave the handcuffs on. 4. For $200.00, she better be good! 3. Can you get him to drop his suit? 2. The judge gave her the stiffest one he could. 1. Think you can get me off?
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Three Italian mothers were attending a football game. Each had a son playing on the same team. At the start of the game, the first boy saw his opportunity, grabbed the ball and running quickly, out-foxed the opposing team, making the first touchdown. His mother, obviously proud of her son, sprang from the bleachers, shouting in her broken Italian accent, “Thatsa *my* boy! I raised him onna de Pet milk. Ain’t he-a Peach?” Soon, the second boy received the ball…
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1.BARCODE: The fighting rules down at the local tavern. 2.BUG: The reason you give for calling in sick. 3.BYTE: What the pit bull did to cousin Jim Bob 4.CACHE: What you have to resort to when you run out of food stamps. 5.CHIP: Pasture muffins that you try not to step in 6.CRASH: When you go to Junior’s party uninvited 7.DIGITAL: Counting on your fingers 8.DISKETTE: A female disco dancer 9.FAX: The only thing the FBI is interested in 10.HACKER:…
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When my economics professor had an alarm installed in his house, he insisted they leave him warning stickers for every window. Ever the thinker, he recouped half the cost of the alarm system by selling the stickers.
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It’s common practice in England to ring a telephone by sending extra voltage across one side of the two wire circuit and ground (earth in England). When the subscriber answers the phone, it switches to the two wire circuit for the conversation. This method allows two parties on the same line to be signaled without disturbing each other. Anyway, an elderly lady with several pets called to say that her telephone failed to ring when her friends called; and that…
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“I think we agree, the past is over.”?On his meeting with John McCain, Dallas Morning News, May 10, 2000 “It’s clearly a budget. It’s got a lot of numbers in it.”–Reuters, May 5, 2000 (Thanks to Allison Fansler.) GOV. BUSH: Because the picture on the newspaper. It just seems so un-American to me, the picture of the guy storming the house with a scared little boy there. I talked to my little brother, Jeb?I haven’t told this to many people.…
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