Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically forward your call to her real number. Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to “I love you.” Hallmark would make “Sorry, what was your name again?” cards. When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she’d appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during a time-out. Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack to…
(0)
Loading...
If Men TRULY ran the world: 1. Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack to the ass and a “Nice hustle, you’ll get ’em next time” would pretty much do it. 2. Birth control would come in ale or lager. 3. Valentine’s Day would be moved to February 29th so it would only occur in leap years. 4. On Groundhog Day, if you saw your shadow, you’d get the day off to go drinking. Mother’s Day too. 5.…
(0)Loading...
The parents of a newborn son were devastated to learn that their baby was born with a golden screw in his navel. Surgeons had never seen this before, and fearing it would harm the boy, refused to operate. The parents were very religious and accepted the birth defect as God’s will. The mother never gave up faith, and as her son grew up she prayed daily for God to cure him. The boy was very shy, always hiding his golden-screw…
(1)Loading...
A very attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub and gestures alluringly to the bartender, who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his full beard. Are you the manager?” she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands. Actually, no,” the man replies. “Can you get him for me?” she asks. I need to…
(1)Loading...
A cowboy & Indian scout been in the desert for a while. Indian travel on foot & tracked on this mission. Job completed, headed for town. Closer they got, the cowboy thought about how good a cold beer would taste, so he road faster & faster. Tried not to overheat the horse or his Indian companion. When they got to the saloon, the horse was lathered with sweat & heat. No air stirring & worried his horse would die, he…
(0)Loading...
Three gang bangers are shot in an aborted holdup. While awaiting their fate to determine whether they are to go to Heaven or to Hell, they sneak out of the holding zone and arrive at the Pearly Gates where upon they are greeted by St. Peter. “Check it out, bro,” says the lead gang banger to St. Peter. “Dis is where we belong.” “I’m sorry,” replies St. Peter, “but I don’t see any of your names on the admittance list.”…
(0)Loading...
ACURA -Another Crummy, Useless, Rotten Automobile AMC -All Makes Combined AMC -A Major Cost AMC -A Mutated Car AMC -A Moron’s Car AMC -Another Major Catastrophe AUDI -Accelerates Under Demonic Influence AUDI -All Unsafe Designs Implemented AUDI -Another Ugly Duetsche Invention AUDI -Always Undermining Deutsche Intelligence AUDI -Automobile Unsafe Designs, Inc. BMW -Babbling Mechanical Wench BMW -Beastly Monsterous Wonder BMW -Beautiful Masterpieces on Wheels BMW -Beautiful Mechanical Wonder BMW -Barely Moving Wreck BMW -Big Money Waste BMW -Big Money. Why?…
(9)Loading...
More Things You’d Never Have Known If Not For the Movies: If you overpower a sentry or guard, his uniform will fit you perfectly. It is possible to brush your teeth without any toothpaste foam appearing on your lips. Handsome men don’t belch or fart. If you’re a team of misfits and losers, you’ll win the championship. In a large city, the streets are always wet at night. Most bathrooms do not have a toilet. All orphans can sing and…
(0)Loading...
A blonde goes into a world wide message center to send a message to her mother. When the man tells her it will be $300, she exclaims, “I don’t have any money.. but I would do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother!” To that the man asks, “Anything?” And the blonde says, “yes.. Anything!” With that, the man says, “Follow me.” He walks into the next room and tells her, “Come in and close the door”. She does.…
(2)Loading...
A young woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. She went down to the docks and was about to leap into the frigid water when a handsome young sailor saw her tottering on the edge of the pier crying. He took pity on her and said, “Look, you’ve got a lot to live for. I’m off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away…
(1)Loading...