Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A little old lady went into the Bank of Canada one day, carrying a bag of money. She insisted that she must speak with the president of the bank to open a savings account because, “It’s a lot of money!” After much hemming and hawing, the bank staff finally ushered her into the president’s office (the customer is always right!). The bank president then asked her how much she would like to deposit. She replied, “$165,000!” and dumped the cash…
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My Grandpa and Grandma were sitting on their porch swing enjoying the nice evening breeze, when Grandpa lovingly leaned over and said, “Hey Ma, I’m gonna have some ice cream, would you like some?” “Yeah, Pa, but you’d better write it down or you’ll forget”, says Grandma. Grandpa replies, “I won’t forget.” “Alright then”, says Grandma, “I’d like nuts and whipped cream and a cherry on mine. You’d better write that down, Pa you’re gonna forget it.” Disgruntled, Grandpa storms…
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A middle-aged man is out on a date with a lovely young lady. At the restaurant where they sat having dinner, the young lady asked him. “Have you ever been married? The man says, “Well, yes I was. But, I lost my wife a long time ago.” “How did she die?” asked the young lady. The man replied, “She was eaten by a huge 200 lb pitbull. It’s her own fault, though. She should’ve known how dangerous it was. Why,…
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On his first visit to the zoo, a little boy stared at the caged stork for a long time. He waved, jumped up and down and stared at the stork awhile longer. Finally, turning to his father, he exclaimed, “Gee, Dad, he doesn’t even recognize me!”
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There were two baseball players whom had been friends for a long time. Well, they had made a promise to each other that if one had died before the other that he would come back and tell him how heaven was. As fate would have it, one of the men died in a car crash a couple of weeks later. One night while he was getting ready to go to bed, his dead buddy appeared in his room, so he…
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A girl and this guy have been going out for a long time when she finally says, “I have got to have you NOW!” He says, “How?” “Well, there’s a tree in my backyard. You can put me in it then fuck me.” He agrees, so they go in the backyard and he puts her in the tree and they do it. He takes her down and she goes inside to her room. Finally his conscience gets to him and…
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Once a long time ago, there was a season when neither the Packers nor the Vikings made the post-season playoffs. It seemed so unusual that the management of both teams got together and decided that there should be some sort of competition between the two teams, because of their great on-going rivalry. So they decided on a week-long fishing competition. The team that catches the most fish at the end of the week wins. On a cold, northern Wisconsin lake,…
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For you ladies (and men so you’re prepared), a little MEN ARE LIKE humor: MEN ARE LIKE… Floor Tiles, if you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them for years. MEN ARE LIKE… Bank Accounts, without a lot of money, they don’t generate much interest. MEN ARE LIKE… Blenders, you need one, but you’re not quite sure why. MEN ARE LIKE… Chocolate Bars, sweet, smooth and they usually head right to your hips. MEN ARE…
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No, really, I’m O.K. to drive… – I’m wasted, and I am too embarrassed to have anybody see who I’m going with I’m not used to these darts… – I’m not used to throwing anything smaller than a pool cue when I’m this bombed. Let’s go out to my car and get some cigarettes…(male to female) – You would look great face down in my lap. Want to check out my new car stereo? (male to female) – I have…
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A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him. “Why do we have to learn this stuff for a medical degree?” the young man blurted out. “To save lives,” the professor replied before continuing the lecture. In a few minutes, the student spoke up again. “So how does physics save lives?” The professor stared at the student for a long time. “Physics saves lives,” he said, “because it keeps the…
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