Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A guy sticks his head in the barber shop and asks, “How long before I can get a haircut?” The barber looks around the shop and says, “About two hours.” The guy leaves. A few days later, the same guy sticks his head in the door and asks, “How long before I get a haircut?” The barber looks around the shop full of customers and says, “About two hours.” The guy leaves. A week later, the same guy sticks his…
(1)
Loading...
A large, well established, Canadian lumber camp advertised that they were looking for a good Lumberjack. The very next day, a skinny little man showed up at the camp with his axe, and knocked on the head lumberjacks’ door. The head lumberjack took one look at the little man and told him to leave. “Just give me a chance to show you what I can do,” said the skinny man. “Okay, see that giant redwood over there?” said the lumberjack.…
(0)Loading...
HOW DOGS AND MEN ARE THE SAME 1. Both take up too much space on the bed. 2. Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning. 3. Both mark their territory. 4. Neither tells you what’s bothering them. 5. The smaller ones tend to be more nervous. 6. Neither does any dishes. 7. Both fart shamelessly. 8. Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut. 9. Both like dominance games. 10. Both are suspicious of the postman. 11. Neither…
(1)Loading...
Three old ladies were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home. About then an old man walked by, and one of the old ladies said, “We bet we can tell how old you are.” The old man said there ain’t no way you can guess it. One of the old ladies said: “Sure we can. Drop your pants!” He did. The three ladies looked at him for a few moments and then the other lady said, “Take off your…
(0)Loading...
A thief burst into a Florida bank one day wearing a ski mask and carrying a gun. Aiming his gun at the guard, the thief yelled, “FREEZE, MOTHER-STICKERS, THIS IS A F*CK-UP!” For a moment, everyone was silent. Then the snickers started. The guard completely lost it and doubled over laughing. It probably saved his life, because he’d been about to draw his gun. He couldn’t have drawn and fired before the thief got him. The thief ran away and…
(1)Loading...
ACURA -Another Crummy, Useless, Rotten Automobile AMC -All Makes Combined AMC -A Major Cost AMC -A Mutated Car AMC -A Moron’s Car AMC -Another Major Catastrophe AUDI -Accelerates Under Demonic Influence AUDI -All Unsafe Designs Implemented AUDI -Another Ugly Duetsche Invention AUDI -Always Undermining Deutsche Intelligence AUDI -Automobile Unsafe Designs, Inc. BMW -Babbling Mechanical Wench BMW -Beastly Monsterous Wonder BMW -Beautiful Masterpieces on Wheels BMW -Beautiful Mechanical Wonder BMW -Barely Moving Wreck BMW -Big Money Waste BMW -Big Money. Why?…
(9)Loading...
28 Things Guys Wish Girls Knew 1.. We’re not as big of perverts as you think we all are. 2.. No matter what you say, your ex-boyfriend is an asshole 3.. We like you to give us hugs and kisses sometimes too. 4.. Don’t argue with us when we call you beautiful. 5.. Don’t treat us like crap, what goes around comes around. 6.. We know you’re pretty, that’s one of the reason’s we’re going out with you. 7.. Don’t…
(24)Loading...
A man in a bar said to the bartender, “I’ll bet you a hundred bucks I can bite my own eye!” The bartender, convinced this was impossible, accepted. The man pulled out his false teeth, bit his eye gently with them, and replaced them in his mouth. The bartender was pretty upset, but paid the $100. A few minutes later, the man approached the bartender again. “Look,” he said, “I’ll give you a chance to win that hundred back. I’ll…
(0)Loading...
He: Haven’t we met before? She: Yes, I’m the receptionist at the Bad Breath Clinic. He: Is this seat empty? She: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down. He: So, wanna go back to my place? She: I don’t know. Can two people fit under a rock? He: Your place or mine? She: Both. You go to yours and I’ll go to mine. He: So what do you do for a living? She: I’m a female…
(0)Loading...
Joe Sperm decided to get in shape, so when the big day came, he could be the one to find the egg. Every day, he ran long distance sprints, lifted weights, and anything else he thought would keep him in shape. The other sperm all laughed at him. Finally, the big day came. Joe was off like a flash, and very soon, the other sperm lost sight of him. They all thought they had lost, when suddenly they saw Joe…
(0)Loading...