Huge room Jokes - page 2

Little Johnny and Susie

Little Johnny and Susie are only 10 years old, but they just know that they are in love. One day they decide that they want to get married, so Johnny goes to Susie’s father to ask him for her hand. Johnny bravely walks up to him and says, “Mr. Smith, me and Susie are in love and I want to ask you for her hand in marriage.” Thinking that this was the cutest thing, Mr. Smith replies, “Well Johnny, you…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeLittle Johnny and Susie

The New Titanic script

(Scene 1) KATE WINSLET: My, this is a fancy boat, isn’t it? KATE’S WEASELLY FIANCE: Yes, it certainly is. Here is the art you asked for. It is by an artist named “Picasso.” I am certain he will amount to nothing. KATE: Ha ha ha. That is very funny to our 90’s audience, because they know these priceless paintings will sink with the boat. LEONARDO DiCAPRIO: Hello, I’m Leonardo DiCaprio. Perhaps you have seen the many Internet sites dedicated to…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeThe New Titanic script

Hell’s not so bad

A young man died somewhat before his time in a motor accident, and found himself in Hell. He sat in a hot ante-room surrounded by swirling sulphurous gases as he gloomily awaited his fate. He’d heard all the jokes. “OK lads, tea break’s over, back on your heads.” Being forced to listen to a continuous Barry Manilow tape. The electrodes on the goolies. It made him shiver. Finally Satan arrived, detected the young chap’s demeanour and said, “Hey, why so…

(2)Loading...

Read JokeHell’s not so bad

Drifting Off in Class

Sometimes, when I’m in class, I dream that I’m on a tropical island, with a dozen or more scantily clad females beside me, sitting under a huge palm tree, with some soft, gentle music being played on some traditional wood instruments of that region, and a cool, gentle breeze caressing my tanned body. I do all this while trying to forget I’m in a classroom. Of course, it would be so much easier if all my students weren’t waiting for…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeDrifting Off in Class

10 things women will NEVER understand about Men:

Men are a misunderstood lot, which all in all is probably for the best. Women are better off not knowing that we eat with our hands the minute they leave the room or that we use their nail clippers to trim our nose hair. Better for them, better for us. Still, it’s annoying that women spend more time and money trying to understand the minds of cats than they do, wondering about what makes men tick. Which is why they’ll…

(0)
Loading...

Read Joke10 things women will NEVER understand about Men:

bigger isn’t always better…

Jason was a strapping handsome seventeen-year-old guy who was short-changed in the brains and equipment departments. His sister Tracy was sixteen and lacked nothing in either department, so he depended on her for advice. One day in the kitchen when the rest of the family was still asleep, he said to her, “I was at the beach yesterday and I got the feeling that a lot of girls were whispering and giggling about me. Why would they do that?” “Well,…

(0)
Loading...

Read Jokebigger isn’t always better…

I wanna be held

A husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up. But then the wife stops and says, “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.” The husband asks, “WHAT??” The wife explains that he must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a woman. The husband realizes that nothing is going to happen that night, and he might as well deal with it. The next day the husband takes…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeI wanna be held

TECHNIQUES ON BEING AN EFFECTIVE EMPLOYEE

1. Never walk down the hall without a document in your hands. People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they?re heading for the cafeteria. People with the newspaper in their hands look like they?re heading for the bathroom. Above all, make sure you carry loads of stuff home with you at night, thus generating the false impression that you work longer hours than you do.…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeTECHNIQUES ON BEING AN EFFECTIVE EMPLOYEE

Language Barrier

An Italian, a Scotsman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy, “You”re in charge of sweeping.” To the Irishman, he says, “You”re in charge of shoveling.” And to the Chinese guy, “You”re in charge of supplies.” He then says, “Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you gusy to make a dent in that there pile.” So the…

(2)Loading...

Read JokeLanguage Barrier

Wedding Day Revenge

This actually IS true. It was in the local newspaper and even Jay Leno mentioned it! Only in South Carolina!! Bitter sweet revenge. It’s about a recent wedding that took place at Clemson University. This was a huge wedding with about 300 guests. After the wedding, at the reception, the groom got up on stage at the microphone to talk to the crowd. He said that he wanted to thank everyone for coming, many from long distances, to support them…

(4)Loading...

Read JokeWedding Day Revenge