Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
There is a blond burnet and a redhead they were chosen to play a surviver game. they have to find help! so they were aloud to bring one thing the burnet brought some food the redhead brought some water and the blond brought a car door so they all sticked together and searched for help and they found help so the guy asked the burnet why did u bring some water? she said in case i got thirsty he asked…
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“Haven’t I seen you before?” “Nice ass.” “I’m a Romantic.” “I’m poor.” “I need you” “My hand is tired.” “I am different from all the other guys” “I am not circumcised.” “I really want to get to know you better.” “So I can tell my friends about it.” “It’s just orange juice, try it.” “3 more shots, and she’ll have her legs around my head.” “She’s kinda cute.” “I want to have sex with her till I am blue.” “I…
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In the days of horses and carts a couple get hitched. On the ride home after the reception, the fellows horse keeps playing up, every 100 yards or so the horse would come to a dead stop for no apparent reason. The groom jumps from the cart, walks to the horses face, holding one finger up…”That’s ONE!” he yells, and quickly remounts up onto the buggy. The bride shrugs this off, but another hundred yards down the track the horse…
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(ACTUAL NOTES–UNEDITED!): 1. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year 2. On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely. 3. She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night. 4. The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1997. 5. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also…
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The following are actual statements made during court cases: From a defendant representing himself… Defendant: Did you get a good look at me when I stole your purse? Victim: Yes, I saw you clearly. You are the one who stole my purse. Defendant: I should have shot you while I had the chance. ***************************** Defendant: Judge, I want you to appoint me another lawyer. Judge: And why is that? Defendant: Because the Public Defender isn’t interested in my case. Judge…
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A French guest, staying in a hotel in Edmonton, phoned room service for some pepper. “Black pepper or white pepper?” asked the concierge. “Toilette pepper!” replied the guest.
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Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer: Warning: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, but that’s the only time I have to work on my hair.) On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special) On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that would be how?) On…
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We all know what a Birdie (1 under) and a Bogey (one over) are. Now there’s a Lewinsky. It’s when the shot lands three feet from the hole.
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2 photographers are filming lions in the African plains when the lions notice them and begin to walk towards them. One photographer starts to change into a pair of Nike running shoes. ‘No use doing that, you’ll never out run a lion,’ the second photographer says The first guy replies, ‘I don’t give a fuck about the lion, as long as I outrun you I’ll be fine.’
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President Clinton and Hillary were back in Arkansas visiting their old stomping grounds. While they were driving around, they saw that they needed gas, so they pulled into a gas station. Lo and behold, the owner of the gas station was one of Hillary’s old boyfriends. So they shot the breeze and talked about old times. After they drove away, Bill put his arm around Hillary and said, “See, now if you had married that guy, you’d be part owner…
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