Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Big Dog is showing Little Dog around the block. Sniff, sniff. “Smell that?” asks Big Dog. Sniff, sniff. “Sure do,” says Little Dog. “What is it?” “Fifi’s in heat. Come on, I’ll show you what to do.” So Big Dog shows Little Dog how to hump Fifi. Sniff, sniff. “Smell that?” asks Big Dog. Sniff, sniff. Sure do. What’s that?” asks Little Dog. “Garbage. Come on, I’ll show you what to do.” So Big Dog shows Little Dog how to…
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There is a new virus going around, called “work.” If you receive any sort of “work” at all, whether via e-mail, internet or simply handed to you by a colleague…DO NOT OPEN IT. This has been circulating around our building for months and those who have been tempted to open “work” or even look at “work,” have found that their social life is deleted and their brain ceases to function properly. If you do encounter “work” via e-mail or are…
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Have you ever noticed that they put advertisements in with your bills now? As if bills aren’t distasteful enough, they have to stuff junk mail in with them. I get back at them. I put garbage in with my check when I mail it in. Coffee grinds, banana peels . . . I write, “Could you throw this away for me? Thank you.” — Andy Rooney
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Guyness Quiz Take This Scientific Quiz to Determine Your Guyness Quotient 1. Alien beings from a highly advanced society visit the Earth, and you are the first human they encounter. As a token of intergalactic friendship, they present you with a small but incredibly sophisticated device that is capable of curing all disease, providing an infinite supply of clean energy, wiping out hunger and poverty, and permanently eliminating oppression and violence all over the entire Earth. You decide to: a.…
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10. God was worried that Adam would frequently become lost in the garden because he would not ask for directions. 9. God knew that one day Adam would require someone to locate and hand him the remote. 8. God knew Adam would never go out and buy himself a new fig leaf when his wore out and would therefore need Eve to buy one for him. 7. God knew Adam would never be able to make a doctor’s, dentist, or…
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ACURA -Another Crummy, Useless, Rotten Automobile AMC -All Makes Combined AMC -A Major Cost AMC -A Mutated Car AMC -A Moron’s Car AMC -Another Major Catastrophe AUDI -Accelerates Under Demonic Influence AUDI -All Unsafe Designs Implemented AUDI -Another Ugly Duetsche Invention AUDI -Always Undermining Deutsche Intelligence AUDI -Automobile Unsafe Designs, Inc. BMW -Babbling Mechanical Wench BMW -Beastly Monsterous Wonder BMW -Beautiful Masterpieces on Wheels BMW -Beautiful Mechanical Wonder BMW -Barely Moving Wreck BMW -Big Money Waste BMW -Big Money. Why?…
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Dear Customers: It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 98 SOUTHERN EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside the South. If you have one of these, you may need some help understanding the commands. The Southern edition may be recognized by the unique opening screen. It reads “WINDERS 98” and has a background picture of General Robert E. Lee superimposed on a Confederate flag. It is shipped with a Dukes of Hazzard screen saver.…
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I, the undersigned, a female accepting a marriage proposal, agree that… Section 1. In the unlikely event of my not having an orgasm after you’ve drunkenly rolled on top of me and pumped away for five *whole* minutes, wheezing like an old man with emphysema, I shall politely fake one. Section 1.01 And it’ll be a really good act too, with me saying stuff like “So THIS is what hot monkey love is all about!” and howling like a cat…
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A computer was something on TV From a science fiction show of note A window was something you hated to clean And ram was the cousin of a goat. Meg was the name of my girlfriend And gig was a job for the nights Now they all mean different things And that really mega bytes. An application was for employment A program was a TV show A cursor used profanity A keyboard was a piano. Memory was something that you…
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Things Learned from Children For those who already have children past this age, this is hilarious. For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning. For those who have not yet had children, think of this as birth control. 1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 square foot house, 4 inches deep. 2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite. 3.…
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