Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
I was in an ice cream parlor with my friend the other day, Sunday I believe. We watched as a very old limozine pulled up front and parked. A lovely older lady and a small young female ,about 6 years old got out and walked into the parlor. The well dressed older lady asked the young girl what kind of ice cream did she want for her birthday party? The young girl replied ‘Chocolate”. The young man behind the counter…
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One day Little Johnny’s dad went to a psychiatrist and the psychiatrist said every time Johnny swore, the father should put a dog shit in place of one of his presents. So when Johnny’s dad got home, he asked his son, “Johnny, what do ya want for Christmas?” Little Johnny said, “I want to wake up with a great fucking teddy bear next to me. And a great fucking train set around the Christmas tree. And when I go outside…
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A man goes to a pet store looking for a hunting dog. The owner tells him about a very special dog that he has out back. So they go out back and see a nice looking bird-dog. The man is impressed with the dog, but says, “What’s so special about this dog?” The owner answers, “This dog will not only flush out the birds, it will count how many and tell you first.” The man can’t believe it, so he…
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1. Hey baby, why don’t you sit on my lap, and we’ll talk about the first thing that POPS up!!! 2. (motion for girl to come here with one finger), “If I can make you come with this finger, imagine what I could do with all five!” 3. Nice shoes, wanna fuck? 4.If I told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against me? 5. Fuck me if I’m wrong….but haven’t we met before? 6. Do…
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Haven’t we met before? = Nice ass. I like moonlight walks on the beach. = I’m broke. I need you. = I’m getting too old to be chokin’ the chicken. It’s just orange juice…try it. = One of these, she’ll have her legs around my head. She’s a stuck-up bitch. = She won’t sleep with me. Sorry I don’t have time to make you breakfast? = Who the fuck are you? I have something to tell you. = Get tested.…
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What is the difference between a white fairy tale and a black fairy tale? A white fairy tale begins with, “Once Upon a Time…” and a black fairy tale begins with, “You Ain’t Gonna Believe Dis Shit Muthafucka…”
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While a book reviewer for The New Yorker, Dorthy Parker went on her honeymoon. Her editor, Harold Ross, began pressuring her for her belated copy. She replied, “Too fucking busy and vice versa.”
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A man who lost his arms in Vietnam won a million dollars and immediately went to a doctor asking for their most advanced arms. The doctor told him that they had a brand new voice activated arm, but it costed one million dollars so he could only get one. The man agreed and got the arm. One day he goes to a bar to show off the arm to his buddies. He tells the arm to pick up his drink,…
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1. Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted! 2. Q: How do blonde braincells die? A: Alone. 3. Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? A: Pregnant. 4. Q: How do you brainwash a blonde? A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down. 5. Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence. 6. Q: How does a blonde part their…
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2 photographers are filming lions in the African plains when the lions notice them and begin to walk towards them. One photographer starts to change into a pair of Nike running shoes. ‘No use doing that, you’ll never out run a lion,’ the second photographer says The first guy replies, ‘I don’t give a fuck about the lion, as long as I outrun you I’ll be fine.’
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