Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
The teacher asked the students to bring an electrical appliance for “Show and Tell,” and the next day every kid had something. The teacher asks Wendy, “What did you bring? “I brought a Walkman.” “And what is it for?” “You can listen to music with it!” “That’s nice, Wendy. And what did you bring, Kenny?” “I brought a ‘lectrical can opener. It opens cans!” “Well done, Kenny. But it seems that Johnny didn’t bring anything!” “Yes, I did. It’s in…
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Two Italian men were sitting behind a woman on a bus. “Emma come first,” one of the men said to the other. “Denna I come. Two asses, they come together. I come again. Denna two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Denna I come oncea more.” “You pigs,” the lady yelled. “In this country, we don’t talk about our sex lives in public!” “Hey, coola down, lady,” the one man said. “Imma justs tellun him…
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It was the first day of Grade Three in a new town for Dave. As a test, his teacher went around the room and asked each of the students to count to 50. Some did very well, counting as high as 30 or 40 with just a few mistakes. Others couldn’t get past 20. Dave, however, did extremely well; he counted past 50, right up to 100 without any mistakes. He was so excited that he ran home ahd told…
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A grandmother was surprised by her seven-year-old helper early one morning. He had made her coffee! She drank what was probably the worst cup of coffee in her entire life. And when she got to the bottom, to her utter amazement, there were three little green, army men in her cup. Puzzled, she asked, “Honey, what are these army men doing in my coffee?” Her grandson answered, “Grandma, you know how it says on TV, ‘The best part of waking…
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A little old lady’s phone rings late one night and she answers it. “Hello?” A deep voice on the other end says, “I know you, you’d like me to push you down on the bed and rip all your clothes off, lick your body all over and make rough love to you.” The old lady looks at the phone blushing and in amazement and replies, “Wow. You can really tell all this from a single ‘Hello?’”
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An inter-office softball game was held every year between the Marketing and Support Staff of one company. The Support Staff whipped the Marketing Department soundly. To show just “how” the Marketing Department earns their keep, they posted this memo on the bulletin board after the game: “The Marketing Department is pleased to announce that for the 1999 Softball Season, we finished in 2nd place, having lost but one game all year. The Support Department, however, had a rather dismal season,…
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Actor Michael Wilding was once asked whether actors had any distinguishing features that set them apart from other human beings. “Without a doubt,” he replied. “You can pick out actors by the glazed look that comes into their eyes when the conversation wanders away from themselves.”
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Bill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself being sized up by God…. “Well, Bill, I’m really confused on this call; I’m not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows ’95. I’m going to do something I’ve never done before. I’m going to let you decide where you want to go.” Bill replied,…
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A teacher is giving a spelling bee. She asks little John to spell the word, “Before.” “Um…Before: b-e-e-f-o-r,” he replies, erroneously. The teacher then calls on Suzy. “Before: b-e-p-h-o-r.” Again, she too is wrong, and the teacher calls on little Leroy. “Before: b-e-f-o-r-e,” gloats the little boy. Very good, Leroy! Now can you use the word in a sentence?” “Yeah. Before: Two and two be fore.”
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This cowboy walked into a bar and saw a beautiful blonde sitting on a stool. He walked up to her and asked her, “Can I smell your pussy?” The blonde says, “Certainly not.” The cowboys says, “Oh, then it must be your feet.”
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