Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Little 14 year old Johnny was in his room masturbating. Suddenly, his Mother opened the door and caught him. Thinking fast, she told him that he shouldn’t be doing that, he should save it for when he gets married. Twelve years later, Johnny fell in love and got married. At his reception, he pulled his Mother aside and asked her if she remembered what she had told him when she caught him masturbating. She said yes, she did. Hearing this,…
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Many years ago, a girlfriend of mine attempted to introduce “culture” into my dismal life, by taking me to our nation’s finest museums, art galleries and concert halls. I was genuinely impressed with her love of the arts, and made a serious attempt to learn, but I guess I forgot to mention to her that “creating humor” is ALSO an “art.” On one journey to a nice art gallery, we marveled at a life-sized replica of the statue of the…
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One day, a Newfie, a Quebecer and an Albertan were walking down the street when they came across an old lamp. The Newfie picked it up and gave it a good rub. Lo and behold, out popped a genie. The genie said, “I’ve been imprisoned in that lamp for 2000 years and since you have released me, I will give each of you one wish.” The Newfie thought about it for a minute and said, “Well, my granfather was a…
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After undergoing complicated brain surgery, Lena suddenly fell into a coma. The doctors tried very hard to resuscitate her but to no avail. As she lay unconscious in the intensive care unit, her husband Tom was ushered to her bedside. One of the doctors said in a quiet somber voice, “She fell into a coma during the operation. I’m sorry but we did everything possible to revive her. The prognosis is not good. Unless she regains consciousness soon, we’re ruling…
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I was working in a wall street investment bank about 10 years ago when someone from the information technology group came by our office asking us to enter our passwords in the new sofware system. My colleague, Barry, with his usual rebellious attitude, entered the password, “Penis.” We nearly died laughing when the computer issued the following reply to his choice of passwords: ***PASSWORD REJECTED! TOO SHORT.***
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A tourist was passing through a small town one day. He went into a tavern to get a beer and he saw all the locals sitting around shouting out numbers and laughing. He asked a man at the table next to him what was going on. The guy answered “We’ve been telling the same jokes over and over for years now, so for convenience we’ve numbered all our jokes. We simply yell out the number instead of telling the entire…
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Two guys are walking through the woods and come across this big deep hole. “Wow…that looks deep.” “Sure does… toss a few pebbles in there and see how deep it is.” They pick up a few pebbles and throw them in and wait… no noise. “Jeeez. That is REALLY deep… here.. throw one of these great big rocks down there. Those should make a noise.” They pick up a couple of football-sized rocks and toss them into the hole and…
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A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller’s name is Patricia Whack. So he says, “Ms. Whack, I’d like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation.” Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow. The frog says $30,000. The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad…
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Heavyweight boxer James (Quick) Tillis was a cowboy from Oklahoma when he first arrived in Chicago to start his boxing career. He clearly remembers his first day in the Windy City after his arrival from Tulsa. “I got off the bus with two cardboard suitcases under my arms in downtown Chicago and stopped in front of the Sears Tower,” Tillis said. “I put the suitcases down, and I looked up at the Tower and I said to myself, I’m going…
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A man is walking around New York with his wife. They find a perfume shop, the wife goes in, and he waits outside. A hooker comes along and says to him, “Like to come home with me, buddy?” “For how much?” asks the man. “One hundred dollars.” “I’ll give you five bucks.” The hooker swears at him and walks away. A little later, the man’s wife comes out of the shop and they continue their walk. As they round a…
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