Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A college professor always starts his class with a dirty joke. After one particularly vulgar story, all the women decide to leave the next time he starts telling a joke. The next day the Professor comes into the class and says, “Did you hear about the shortage of whores in India?” With that all the women got to their feet and headed toward the door. “Wait,” cried the Professsor, “the boat doesn’t leave until tomorrow!”
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A guy enters a bank to see about getting a business loan. “What kind of business do you want to start?” asks the bank manager. “I have some black powder. You sprinkle it on pussy and it makes it taste like a peach.” “I don’t think we can give you a loan,” was the reply, so the guy left. A few months later he went into the bank with a wheel barrel filled with money. The same bank manager came…
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A young boy goes off to college, but about 1/3 way through the semester, he has foolishly squandered what money his parents gave him. “Hmmmm,” he wonders, “How am I gonna get more dough?” Then he gets an idea. He calls his father. “Dad,” he says, “you won’t believe the wonders that modern education is coming up with! Why, they have a program here that will teach Fido how to talk!” “That’s absolutely amazing!” his father says. “How do I…
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In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don’t get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that’s the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the Points System. —————————————— SIMPLE DUTIES: Making The Bed: You make the bed …………………………………………+1 You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows……..0 You throw the…
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Mike Tyson Virus quits after one byte The Ellen Degeneres Virus your IBM suddenly claims it’s a MAC Titanic Virus makes your whole computer go down Disney Virus everything in the computer goes Goofy Prozac Virus screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn’t care Kevorkian Virus searches your hard drive for old files and deletes them Oprah Winfrey Virus your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands to 300MB AT&T Virus every 3 minutes it…
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“I’m not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb…. and I also know that I’m not blonde.” -Dolly Parton- “You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.” -Erica Jong- “I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don’t even want to do anything that…
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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the…
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Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts. If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation? Just think how much deeper the ocean would be if sponges didn’t live there. If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose? (Jared: what do you think?) Whatever happened to preparations A through G? If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from? I went…
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1. I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always. 2. It’s not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer. 3. Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. 4. A man was complaining to a friend: “I had it all – money, a beautiful house, a big car, the love of a beautiful woman; Then, Pow! it was all gone!” “What happened?” asked the…
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