Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A hooker has decided to retire after many years of service. She does not want to spend the remaining years of her life alone, so she decides she wants to get married. She had so many perverted man in the past that she wanted only a virgin male about her age to marry. She put out a worldwide ad in search of a virgin male around 55 years old. After a few months and thorough background checks she decided on…
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Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to “I love you.” Hallmark would make “Sorry, what was your name again?” cards. When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she’d appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during a timeout. Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack to the ass and a “Nice hustle, you’ll get ’em next time” would pretty much do it. The…
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One day this farm boy goes to town to buy a new rooster. While he is walking around town with his new rooster he sees a movie he would like to see, but he knows that they won’t let his rooster in . So he thinks, “I know, I’ll just put him in the bib of my overalls and they will just think I’m fat.” So he puts the rooster in his overalls, buys a ticket and goes in. Well,…
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This drunken old yahoo staggers into a bar with a frightened look on his face. “I need a drink right away!” The bartender asked what was wrong and the drunk explained, “I was on the street corner ‘paddling the pickle’ when a truck came by, grazed it, and knocked it out of my hand.” The bartender couldn’t beleive what he was hearing but the drunk swore it was true. “You see,” the drunk slurred, “I found it laying by the…
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Why are women like buses?? Because if you miss the first one, the next one is on its way as long as you stand on the corner with your money ready.
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Miss Thelma McDonald, a sweet little old lady, got a great deal of pleasure out of feeding the squirrels in her back yard. There seemed to be a female and a male, whom she named Bonnie and Clyde, and several smaller squirrels whom she assumed were their children. Every morning she would leave mixed nuts under her beautiful sycamore and watch her furry little friends come for breakfast. Her next door neighbor, old Mr. Curdy, did not enjoy the squirrels.…
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1: What do you call a blonde between two brunettes? A mental block! 2: What do you say to a blonde that won’t give in? “Have another beer.” 3: What’s a blonde’s favorite wine? “Daddy! I want to go to Miami 4: Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, a smart blonde, and a dumb blonde are walking down the street. They spot a $100 on the ground. Who gets it? Nobody. The first four don’t exist and the…
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A SNOW DIARY DECEMBER 4 – 5:00 It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our hot buttered rum and sat by the window watching the soft flakes drift down, clinging to the trees and covering the ground. It was beautiful. DECEMBER 9 – We woke to a big beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering the landscape. What a fantastic sight. I shoveled snow for the first time in years and…
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The Raiders Al Davis had finally put together the perfect Raiders team for ?98. The only thing he was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges, and even the high schools, and he couldn?t find a ringer quarterback that would ensure a Super bowl win. Then one night, watching CNN, he saw a war zone in Bosnia. In the background, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a young Bosnian soldier with a truly…
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ARIES You tend to be a headstrong and deliberate in your actions. Basically you don’t give a fuck about anyone. Most people hate you but you couldn’t care less. You’re the type of person who would masturbate at a wedding. TAURUS Warm and caring are your most endearing characteristics. You get on well with most people because you’re bisexual. You hardly ever wear underwear and you constantly smell of piss. GEMINI Your star sign denotes an air of duality in…
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