Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Rejected Dr. Suess Books- 1. One Bitch, Two Bitch, Dead Bitch, Blue Bitch 2. Herbert the Pervert Likes Sherbert 3. Fox in Detox 4. Who Shat in the Hat? 5. Horton Hires a Ho 6. The Flesh Eating Lorax 7. How the Grinch Stole Columbus Day 8. Your Colon Can Moo—Can You? 9. Zippy the Rabid Gerbil 10. The Cat in the Blender 11. Marvin K. Mooney, Get the Fuck Out! 12. Are You My Proctologist? 13. Yentl the Lentil…
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AP–The federal government today released the findings of a four year study that linked living in cages to increased potential of developing cancer in laboratory rats. The study, which cost an estimated $17 million, was started in 1983 when all the rats in a laboratory test control group contracted cancer. Spokesperson John Smith explained: “We were running a test on the possible link between excess popcorn intake and increased incidence of colon cancer. The test group consisted of twenty rats…
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Anesthesia…Movie about crazy Russian girl Aorta…Responsibility, as in “Aorta empty that bedpan” Atrophy…Bowling team award Blue Baby…Newborn Smurf Caplet…Beanie Coccyx…More than one dick Colon…Punctuation mark Coma….Ditto Diarrhea…Little book of personal thoughts Eroded Disc…Worn out LP Fibula…Little white lie Fractures…One half, one third…numbers like that Hyperextension…Extra-long telephone cord Lobotomy…Getting your ears pierced Medicine…Invented lightbulb Shingles…Those thingys on roof Spinal Tap…Rock band or dance step Sternum…Canned heat for camping Tongue Depressor…Makes tongue sad X-rayed…Porno movie
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Why DID the chicken cross the road? VICE PRESIDENT GORE: I fight for the chickens and I am fighting for the chickens right now. I will not give up on the chickens crossing the road! I will fight for the chickens and I will not disappoint them. GOVERNOR GEORGE W. BUSH: I don’t believe we need to get the chickens across the road. I say give the road to the chickens and let them decide. The government needs to let…
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A man moves into a nudist colony. Sometime later, he receives a letter from his mother asking for a current photo of himself in his new location. Too embarrassed to let his mother know that he now lives in a nudist colony, he takes a photo of himself, cuts it in half, and sends her the top piece. A few weeks later, he receives another letter from his mother, this time asking him to send a picture to his grandmother…
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Shortly after being assigned to a new base, a Lieutenant and his wife were invited to the Colonel’s home for an evening of bridge. The Lieutenant was partnered with the Colonel’s wife and vice versa. After many hands, the Lieutenant excused himself to use the toilet, but accidentally left the door ajar. When the sound of splashing echoed through the family room, his wife was greatly embarrassed and attempted to apologize, to which the Colonel’s wife smiled demurely and said,…
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One of the fringe benefits of being an English or History teacher is receiving the occasional jewel of a student blooper in an essay. I have pasted together the following “history” of the world from certifiably genuine student bloopers collected by teachers throughout the United States, from eighth grade through college level. Read carefully, and you will learn a lot. The inhabitants of Egypt were called mummies. They lived in the Sarah Dessert and traveled by Camelot. The climate of…
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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD? JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Isn’t it obvious? Can’t you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the “other side.” That’s what “they” call it the “other side.” Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes…
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Q. What should you do if you girlfriend starts smoking? A. Slow down and use a lubricant. Q. What’s six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? A. Money Q. How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony? A. It’s not hard. Q. Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony? A. The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts. Q: Who is the most…
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In 1928 Colonel John Rotherhampton arrives in Central Africa to take over command of the King’s African Rifles from retiring Lt. Colonel Peter Defries. The retiring CO is very pleased to meet his successor and over a cup of tea at the regimental mess is most enthusiastic about the regiment’s adjutant, Captain Harry S Smithers. The old CO so extols the virtues and soldierly prowess of Capt. Smithers that the new CO decides that he must simply meet this man.…
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