Co ed Jokes - page 7

Computer Geek Poetry

The following is submitted, exactly as authored, but a “translation” follows: >>!*”# ^’`$$- !*=@$_ %*>>~#4 &[]../ |{,,SYSTEM HALTED The symbols above are called “DINGBATS”. Each Dingbat has a NAME. When you speak the name of the symbols, the following “poem” results: Waka waka bang splat tick tick hash, Caret quote back-tick dollar dollar dash, Bang splat equal at dollar under-score, Percent splat waka waka tilde number four, Ampersand bracket bracket dot dot slash, Vertical-bar curly-bracket comma comma CRASH!

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Read JokeComputer Geek Poetry

getting the bull to breed

This cowboy wants to go into the calf business but needed a bull to get things started. He calls up his banker and the banker floats him a loan. Around 6 weeks later, the banker calls the cowboy back and asks him how the bull is performing. Well the cowboy replies that the bull could be a dud and the banker told him to get the vet out there pronto to see if he could the bull to start producing.…

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Bush Whacked

In the first presidential debate, Gore was considered “too pushy”. In the second debate, he was regarded as “too passive.” After the third debate, I think we will all know the final analysis: “Too pussy.”

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Geez! I’m Tired

One fellow walks up to another and says “Say, how are you doing?” The other chap says “Geez, I’m really tired”. The other man says, “Really, how come?” “Well, my girlfriend and I agreed that we won’t go to bed angry at each other”. The other chap says “so?” “…I’ve been up since Tuesday”….”

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A Very Brave Soldier, Indeed

A Navy Admiral, a Marine General and an Army General were having some drinks at the officer’s club in a major military base. After a few rounds of iced tea, the Navy Admiral boasted, “You know, the Navy has the bravest fighting men ever to serve in the Armed Forces. I can prove it to you all.” Before the others could protest, the Admiral proceeded to phone his headquarter and asked for the best Navy Seal in his command to…

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Stolen Car Returned

Finishing their shopping at the mall, a couple discovers that their brand-new car was stolen. They file a report at the police station, and a detective drives them back to the parking lot to look for evidence. To their amazement, the car has been returned and there’s a note in it that says “I apologize for taking your car. My wife was having a baby and I hot-wired your ignition to rush her to the hospital. Please forgive the inconvenience.…

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“Wanted”

A tall well-built woman with good reputation, who can cook frog legs,who appreciates a good fuc- schia garden,classic music and tal- king without getting too serious. But please read only lines 1,3,5!

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50th Wedding Anniversary

A couple goes back to their original honeymoon hotel for a celebration of their 50th wedding anniversary. After all the family festivities they retire to the original room they stayed in on their honeymoon night 50 years prior. The woman is done with her bathroom antics and her husband takes her place for his turn to get ready. The elderly man takes quite awhile in the bathroom, as is his norm, and his wife spends the time figuring out the…

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Who started this?

A doctor, an engineer, a rabbi and a lawyer were debating who was the world’s first professional. The Doctor said, “It must have been a doctor. Who else could have helped with the world’s first surgery of taking a rib from Adam to create Eve, the first woman?” “No,” said the rabbi. “It must have been a rabbi, since the Lord needed someone to help preach his message to Adam and the world.” “Wait,” said the engineer. “The world was…

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Concealment Doesn’t Count

It’s more than obvious: The high technology of the information age isn’t for everyone. Consider the man standing by the office fax machine and scratching his head when a co-worker walks by. “Do you know anything about this fax machine?” the puzzled fellow asks. “A little. What’s wrong?” “Well, I sent a fax, and the recipient called back to say all she received was a blank page. I tried it again, and the same thing happened.” “How did you load…

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Read JokeConcealment Doesn’t Count