Chicken dinner Jokes - page 2

If Men Were In Charge Of Weddings…..

There would be a “Rehearsal Dinner Kegger” until the cops showed up. Bridesmaids would wear matching blue jean cut-offs and halter tops. They would have NO tan lines and more skin showing than not. Tuxes would have team logos on the back and the Nike shoes would have matching team colors. June weddings would be scheduled around basketball play-offs. Vows would mention cooking and sex specifically, but omit that “forsaking all others” part. The couple would leave the ceremony in…

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Mama sets it Straight

“Eat your dinner Moisha,” said his mother. “I’m not hungry Mama,” he replied. “But I made your favorite chicken soup,” said his mother. “It’s no use Mama,” said Moisha. “I’m too worried to eat.” “What are you so worried about?” enquired his mother. “Well,” Moisha replied. “I gave Mr. Cohen a cheque for $500 and I don’t have any money in the bank.” His mother nodded her head, picked up the phone and dialed. “Mr Cohen,” she cood. “That cheque…

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A Jewish Mother’s Day Joke

Three Jewish immigrant brothers named Moshe, Aaron and Daniel, had a dinner reunion to celebrate their fifteen years stay in America. Since Mother’s Day was just around the corner, they were discussing the gifts they would be giving their Momma back home in Israel. Moshe the eldest brother said, “I had a mansion built in Jerusalem and Momma would be moving into it on Mother’s Day.” Aaron the middle brother said, “I bought a special edition Mercedes Benz for Momma…

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If MEN planned weddings

There would be a “Rehearsal Dinner Kegger” until the cops showed up. Bridesmaids would wear matching blue jean cutoffs and halter tops. They would have NO tan lines and more skin showing than not. Tuxes would have team logos on the back and the Nike shoes would have matching team colors. June weddings would be scheduled around basketball play-offs. Vows would mention cooking and sex specifically, but omit that “forsaking all others” part. The couple would leave the ceremony in…

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The Classifieds

(Actual excerpts from classified sections of city newspapers) Illiterate? Write today for free help. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you’ll never go anywhere again. Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it. Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel. Stock up and save. Limit: one. Semi-Annual…

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Blonde’s Cooking Diary

Dear Diary, Monday: Now home from honeymoon and settled in our new home. It’s fun to cook for Bob. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said, “Beat 12 eggs separately.” The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls. ” Tuesday: Bob wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said, “Serve without dressing.” So I didn’t dress. What a surprise when Bob brought a friend home for supper. Wednesday: A good day for rice. Recipe said,…

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Read JokeBlonde’s Cooking Diary