Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
I, the undersigned, a female accepting a marriage proposal, agree that… Section 1. In the unlikely event of my not having an orgasm after you’ve drunkenly rolled on top of me and pumped away for five *whole* minutes, wheezing like an old man with emphysema, I shall politely fake one. Section 1.01 And it’ll be a really good act too, with me saying stuff like “So THIS is what hot monkey love is all about!” and howling like a cat…
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Once a woman went to the fruit store with her baby son, who everybody thought he was so ugly and never said a nice word as courtesy. But she noticed the store guy playing with her son, so she was so happy and thanked the nice man and said, “You are so nice to play with him, everyone avoids him..!” Guy: “Rubbish! Here, give him a banana, he’s the nicest monkey I’ve ever seen !”
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A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said, “That’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen.” In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong. “The bus driver insulted me!” she fumed. The man sympathized and said, “Why, he’s a public servant and shouldn’t say…
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A woman carrying a baby got on a bus and after paying the fare, took a seat behind the bus driver. Later on, a drunken man got on the same bus and after paying his fare, took a seat beside the woman carrying a baby. Since they were the only passengers on the bus, the drunk tried to strike up a conversation with the woman who tried her best to ignore him. Then the drunk took one look at the…
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Joe woke up one morning and looked for his wife, but his wife wasn’t there. She had awakened and was preparing breakfast in the kitchen. Joe was afraid he might spoil things by getting up, so he called his little boy and sent this note to his wife: THE TENT POLE IS UP, THE CANVAS IS SPREAD, THE HELL WITH BREAKFAST, COME BACK TO BED. The wife answered the note and sent it back by the boy. It read: TAKE…
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(to the tune of car innuendo guy) Oh, baby baby baby I wanna check your emissions, Buh buh baby baby baby I wanna grind your transmission. Buh buh baby baby baby, my fuzzy dice are feeling ripe ‘Cause I wanna shove my manly crankshaft up your rusty tailpipe I’m your car innuendo guy, your car innuendo guy Oh, baby baby baby Pump my piston ’til it’s sore Buh buh baby baby baby I wanna slam your back door Buh buh…
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A woman carrying her baby boarded a bus. When the bus driver saw the baby she was carrying, he remarked carelessly, “What an ugly baby!” Flustered, the woman hurriedly dropped her coins into the fare box and stomped angrily to the back of the bus. She took her seat beside a middle-aged clergyman who noticed that she was upset and close to tears. He asked her solicitously, “What’s the matter? Is something wrong?” “That bus driver just insulted me!” she…
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A young lady and her new born baby was happily sitting in passenger train when suddenly a drunk appeared out of nowhere and looked at the baby and said, “That’s an ugly baby. A very ugly baaby!” Feeling insulted and totally mortified she called the conductor. She told the conductor, “This man has insulted me. I do not want to be here on this train with him. Please stop this train immediately so I can get off!” The conductor said,…
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An American and a Japanese were sitting on the plane on the way to LA when the American turned to the Japanese and asked, “What kind of ‘ese’ are you?” The Japanese confused, replied, “Sorry, but I don’t understand what you mean.” The American repeated,”What kind of ‘ese’ are you?” Again, the Japanese was confused over the question. The American, now irritated, loudly repeated, “Jeez, how tough is this — what kind of ‘ESE’ are you? Are you ChinESE or…
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A man entered the zoo one day. He was walking past the ape cage when a strong wind blew up, stirring a great deal of dust. Some got in the man’s eye, so he reached up and began tugging on his eyelid to remove it. An ape saw this and charged the cage, ripped apart the bars, and proceeded to pummel the man. When the zookeeper finally hauled the ape off, the man asked what that was all about. “Well,”…
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