Blue hair Jokes - page 2

My First Time

The sky was dark, The moon was high, All alone, just her and I. Her hair so soft, Her eyes so blue, I knew just what she wanted to do. Her skin so soft, Her legs so fine, I ran my fingers down her spine. I didn’t know how, But I tried my best, I placed my hands on her soft sweet breast. I remember my fear, My fast beating heart, But slowly she spread her legs apart. And when…

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New Barbie Dolls for Christmas 1999

Now that Barbie is nearing 40, we’ve created new dolls that more realistically reflect her current life-style. 1. Bifocals Barbie: Includes her own set of blended lens fashion frames in 6 wild colors. Includes neck chain and large print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living. 2. Hot Flash Barbie: Press Barbie’s bellybutton and see her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead and upper lip. Complete with tiny tissues. 3. Facial Hair Barbie:…

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How to Satisfy a Man

How to Satisfy a Woman Every Time Lick, paw, ogle, caress, praise, pamper, relish, savor, massage, empathize, serenade, compliment, support, dig, floralize, feed, laminate, tantalize, bathe, humor, placate, stimulate, jiffylube, stroke, console, bark, purr, hug, baste, marinate, coddle, excite, pacify, tattoo, protect, phone, correspond, anticipate, nuzzle, smooch, toast, minister to, forgive, sacrifice, ply, accessorize, leave, return, beseech, sublimate, entertain, charm, lug, drag, crawl, tunnel, show equality for, spackle, oblige, fascinate, attend, implore, bawl, shower, shave, ululate, trust, dip, twirl, dive,…

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Blondes’ Revenge

Blondes, having endured years of abuse, have finally responded. Here’s what they have to say about redheads and brunettes! ********* REDHEADS ********* How do you get a redhead to argue with you? Say something How do you get a redhead’s mood to change? Wait 10 seconds If you love a Redhead, set her free … if she follows you everywhere you go, she pitches a tent in your front lawn and puts your new girlfriend in the hospital, she’s yours.…

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Baked Beans

Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him. One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry, he thought to himself, she’ll never go through with the marriage with me carrying on like this, so he made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Shortly after that they…

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Old man and a punker

An old man was riding a bus when it pulled to stop for new riders. A punker got on with spiked, yellow-blue and green hair, earrings in the eyes, ears and nose, and tattoos all over his body. The only seat available was right across from the old man. The old man was staring at the punker and after a few minutes the punker hollered, ?Hey you old fart, what are you staring at?? He replied, ? I was in…

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the blonde family

The blond family was the perfect american family –mom, dad, brother, and little sister…and of course they all had blonde hair and blue eyes!! One day little sister found a brunette wig and put it on, she went in the bathroom and put on some of mom’s mascara, and put in some brown contacts… Then she went and found her dad and said. “Daddy, daddy, look I’m a brunette, look dad!!!” Well, dad didn’t even look up from the tv.…

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Yo mamma — THE LIST

YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off…

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Read JokeYo mamma — THE LIST

Whole Lotta Yo Mama

SO BIG Yo mama’s so big, that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step. Yo mama’s so big, her belly button’s got an echo. Yo mama’s so big, she can’t wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back. Yo mama’s so big, she rollerskates on busses. Yo mama’s so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers. Yo mama’s so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker. Yo mama’s so big, she uses bowling…

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Grandpa?

Many many years ago when I was twenty three, I got married to a widow who was pretty as could be. This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red. My father fell in love with her, and soon the two were wed. This made my dad my son-in-law and changed my very life. My daughter was my mother, for she was my father’s wife. To complicate the matters worse, although it brought me joy. I soon became…

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