Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Two friends, an Italian boy and a Jewish boy, come of age at the same time. The Italian boy’s father presents him with a brand-new pistol. On the other side of town, at his Bar Mitzvah, the Jewish boy receives a beautiful gold watch. The next day in school, the two boys are showing each other what they got. It turns out that each boy likes the other’s present better, and so they trade. That night, when the Italian boy…
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Two friends, an Italian boy and a Jewish boy, come of age at the same time. The Italian boy’s father presents him with a brand-new pistol. On the other side of town, at his Bar Mitzvah, the Jewish boy receives a beautiful gold watch. The next day in school, the two boys are showing each other what they got. It turns out that each boy likes the other’s present better, and so they trade. That night, when the Italian boy…
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*************************************** IT IS SATURDAY, a crisp Winter’s afternoon, and you’re exactly where you should be: stretched out on the sofa in front of a televised sporting event, opening beer number two, relaxed in the knowledge that the pizza you ordered is even now on its way. Nothing could improve this moment, except maybe a bigger television. Suddenly your wife enters the room and says, “What exactly do you think you’re doing?” Is this a trick question? Yes, it is. The…
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“Did you hear what happened?” Jim asked, when he saw me walking down the hallway at work. “Hear what?” I asked, my curiosity peaked. “The Regional Vice President died this morning!” “What?!!” I asked, totally stunned. “What happened?” “He was working through lunch when he had a heart attack,” Jim began explaining. “Everyone was gone except his secretary. You know the one.” “Boy, do I! She’s that young blonde babe.” “Yeah, that’s the one. Turns out she isn’t too smart,…
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A young lady in the maternity ward just prior to labor is asked by the midwife if she would like her husband to be present at the birth. “I’m afraid I don’t have a husband,” she replies. “OK, do you have a boyfriend?” asks the Midwife. “No, no boyfriend either.” “Do you have a partner then?” “No, I’m unattached; I’ll be having my baby on my own.” After the birth, the midwife again speaks to the young woman. “You have…
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“I think we agree, the past is over.”?On his meeting with John McCain, Dallas Morning News, May 10, 2000 “It’s clearly a budget. It’s got a lot of numbers in it.”–Reuters, May 5, 2000 (Thanks to Allison Fansler.) GOV. BUSH: Because the picture on the newspaper. It just seems so un-American to me, the picture of the guy storming the house with a scared little boy there. I talked to my little brother, Jeb?I haven’t told this to many people.…
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X-FILE CASE #1224 ================ 57 ELM STREET BETHLEHEM, PA. 11:51 P.M., DECEMBER 24TH Mulder: Scully! We’re too late! It’s already been here. Scully: Mulder, I hope you know what you’re doing. Mulder: Look, Scully, just like the other homes: Douglas fir, truncated, mounted, transformed into a shrine; halls decked with boughs of holly; stockings hung by the chimney, with care. Scully: You really think someone’s been here? Mulder: Someone … or something. Scully: Mulder, over here — it’s a fruitcake.…
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A man has a dog that snores in his sleep.Annoyed, because she can’t sleep his wife goes to the vet to see if he can help. The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog’s testicles and he will stop snoring. A few hours after going to bed, the dog is snoring as usual. Finally, unable to sleep, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of ribbon and ties it around the dog’s testicles; sure…
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How do you confuse a blonde boy? You put him in a circular room and tell him to pee in the corner. Why do blondes wear underwear? To keep their ankles warm. Why did eighteen blondes go to the movies? Because the sign said, “Seventeen and under not admitted.” What do you call a blonde holding a dollar over her head All you can eat under a buck A dumb blonde and a smart blonde jump off of a roof.…
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At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, “Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?” The little boy nodded in the affirmative. “Do you understand that what matters is whether we win together, as a team?” The little boy nodded, yes. “So,” the coach continued, “when a strike is called, or you’re out at first, you don’t argue or curse or attack the umpire. Do you understand all that?” Again,…
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