Air force one Jokes - page 2

President Clinton in Africa

Earlier this year, when President Clinton visited various African nations, he had some interesting comments to say just prior to a press conference. At one of his stops, as he came down to the bottom of the steps off of Air Force One, a shapely African woman walked up to greet him. “Hello, young lady, what tribe do you belong to?” the President asks. “Ubange,” she answered, to which the President said, “Youbetcha. Right after the press conference.”

(0)
Loading...

Read JokePresident Clinton in Africa

A lot of happy people

Clinton, Dole, and Perot are on a long flight in Air Force One. Perot pulls out a $100 bill and says “I’m going to throw this $100 bill out and make someone down below happy.” Dole, not wanting to be outdone, says, “If that was my $100 bill, I would split it into 2 $50 bills and make two people down below happy.” Of course Clinton doesn’t want these two candidates to outdo him, so he pipes in, “I would…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeA lot of happy people

A Happy Nation

Gore and the First family were on board Air Force One, when Clinton turned to Gore and says;”You know if I throw a hundred dollar bill out the window I could make one person very happy!” Gore just shrugs his stiff shoulders and says, “Well I could throw 10 ten dollars bills out the window and make 10 people very happy! Not to be left out Hilary tosses her hair-sprayed stiff hair and says; “I could throw 100 one dollar…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeA Happy Nation

Clinton’s Pigs

Bill Clinton bought two pigs for Hillary, and Chelsie, while in Dallas. when he was gettin on Air Force One, A Secret Service agent said, “Mighty fine pigs you got there Mr. President.” “Thanks. This one’s for Hillary (refering to the one on the right),And this one’s for Chelsie.” (refering to the one on the left) The Secret Service agent smiled and said, “Good Trade.”

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeClinton’s Pigs

Definition of a Tragedy

President Bill Clinton was addressing a group of school children and explaining the importance of choosing precisely the right words to express your thoughts. He asked the class if someone could give an example of the word Tragedy. A little boy raised his hand and said “If two children were having a catch and the ball rolled into the street and one of the children ran after it and got killed by a car, that would be a tragedy”. The…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeDefinition of a Tragedy

Snoring Prevention

By the time the sailor pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken. “You’ve got to have a room somewhere,” he pleaded. “Or just a bed, I don’t care where. “Well, I do have a double room with one occupant – an Air Force guy,” admitted the manager, “and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I’m…

(3)Loading...

Read JokeSnoring Prevention

A Very Brave Soldier, Indeed

A Navy Admiral, a Marine General and an Army General were having some drinks at the officer’s club in a major military base. After a few rounds of iced tea, the Navy Admiral boasted, “You know, the Navy has the bravest fighting men ever to serve in the Armed Forces. I can prove it to you all.” Before the others could protest, the Admiral proceeded to phone his headquarter and asked for the best Navy Seal in his command to…

(4)Loading...

Read JokeA Very Brave Soldier, Indeed

19 Things that Took Me 50 Years to Learn

by Dave Berry 1. Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. 2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be “meetings”. 3. There is a very fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.” 4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with…

(2)Loading...

Read Joke19 Things that Took Me 50 Years to Learn

If AOL Made Cars…

1. The AOL car would have a TOP speed of 40 MPH yet have a 200 MPH speedometer. 2. The AOL car would come equipped with a NEW and fantastic 8-Track tape player. 3. The car would often refuse to start and owners would just expect this and try again later. 4. The windshield would have an extra dark tint to protect the driver from seeing better cars. 5. AOL would sell the same model car year after year and…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeIf AOL Made Cars…

Advice for Employers Regarding Women Employees

The following is an excerpt from the July 1943 issue of Transportation Magazine. This was serious and written for male supervisors of women in the work force during World War II – a mere 54 years ago! Obviously, the intent was not to be “funny,” but by today’s standards, this is hilarious! For those of you with efficiency issues, pay attention to #8. ———————————— Eleven Tips on Getting More Efficiency Out of Women Employees: There’s no longer any question whether…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeAdvice for Employers Regarding Women Employees