Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
An old codger goes to visit his doctor about painful peeing. His wife goes with him because the poor old bloke is hard of hearing. After an examination the Doctor says to the old man, “Right, I’ll need you to leave a urine, semen and feces samples for analysis.” The old man didn’t quite hear the Doctor and asks his wife, “What did the Doctor say?” The wife replies, “He wants you to leave your underpants here, dear.”
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Q. What’s pink and hangs out your underpants? A. Your Mother. Q. What’s Blue and doesn’t fit any more? A. A dead epileptic. Q. What’s pink and hard in the morning? A. The Financial Times Crossword. Q. What’s blue and fucks grannies? A. Hypothermia.
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~The following are actual winning analogies in the “worst analogies ever written in a high school essay” contest~ They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan’s teeth. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers…
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A large, powerfully-built guy meets a woman at a bar. After a number of drinks, they agree to go back to his place. As they are making out in the bedroom, he stands up and starts to undress. After he takes his shirt off, he flexes his muscular arms and says “See that baby? That’s 1000 pounds of dynamite!” She begins to drool. The man drops his pants, strikes a bodybuilder pose and says, referring to his thighs, “See these,…
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Three nuns usually take a shortcut through a narrow alley on their way from the church to the convent. Along the way, they always pass by a house with a porch. On the porch is a bird cage wherein a parrot is perched on a swing. As the nuns pass by, the parrot says, “White, white, black.” When they reach the convent, one nun notices that the three colors enumerated by the parrot match the colors of the nuns’ underpants.…
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