Ugly woman
What’s the difference between an ugly woman and a bowling ball? If worse came to worse and you absolutely had to….you could eat a bowling ball….
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Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Ugly woman Jokes
An Ugly Baby
A woman carrying her baby boarded a bus. When the bus driver saw the baby she was carrying, he remarked carelessly, “What an ugly baby!” Flustered, the woman hurriedly dropped her coins into the fare box and stomped angrily to the back of the bus. She took her seat beside a middle-aged clergyman who noticed that she was upset and close to tears. He asked her solicitously, “What’s the matter? Is something wrong?” “That bus driver just insulted me!” she…
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A Really Ugly Man Gets All The Girls
A very good-looking guy walks into a singles bar, gets a drink and has a seat. During the course of the evening he tries to chat up every single woman who walks into the bar, without any luck. Suddenly a really ugly man, and I mean R-E-A-L-L-Y ugly man, walks into the bar. He sits at the bar, and within seconds he is surrounded by women. Very soon he walks out of the bar with the two of the most…
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What A Single Woman Wants In A Man
ORIGINAL List (Before she’s 40 years old) 1. Handsome 2. Charming 3. Financially Successful 4. A Caring Listener 5. Witty 6. In Good Shape 7. Dresses with Style 8. Appreciates the Finer Things 9. Full of Thoughtful Surprises 10. An Imaginative, Romantic Lover REVISED List (When she’s 40 years old and beyond) 1. Not too ugly 2. Doesn’t belch or scratch in public 3. Works steady 4. Doesn’t nod off while she’s emoting 5. Usually remembers the punchlines of jokes…
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UGLY BABY
A woman was boarding the bus one day and as she was getting her fare the driver exclaims, “That’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!” The woman slams her money in the farebox and angrily stomps to her seat. The guy she sits next to asks, “What’s wrong?” The woman says, “The bus driver just insulted me!” “What?!” He’s supposed to be a public servant, and he’s insulting people?” “Yeah, and I should go up there and cuss him out!”…
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3 men’s punishment
Three men (John, Bubba, and Mac) died and went to Hell. All three of them were in a very dark and scary room. Suddenly a loud voice boomed out “John, you have been very bad all of your life. For your punsihment, you must live with this woman for all eternity.” Then a 7 foot tall, skinny, ugly woman walked out and John was forced away with her. Bubba and Mac were shaking after seeing what happened and afraid of…
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THE DUCKS!!!!
There were these three guys, a White man, a African-American man, and a Portuguese guy. (Here in Hawaii we make fun of Portagees!) They all died in a terrible car crash and went to Heaven. They thought it was great! But there was only one big rule, you could not step on any of the ducks or you’d have to spend the rest of the day with an ugly woman. One day, the African-American and the Portagee were walking around…
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Ain’t Nothing Changed
A woman went to the same pet store weekly to buy cat food. Each time she walked in, the parrot on his perch at the door would whistle, and say, “You are sooo fat and, MAN, are you ugly!” This went on for sometime and eventually, in tears, the sensitive woman approached the manager and asked him to do something about the rude parrot. The manager apologized to the woman, telling her that was the only phrase the parrot knew,…
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Honeymoon’s over
An old man and a old woman get married. After the reception, they go to their hotel room. The old man is waiting in bed as his new wife removes her clothes. As soon as she is ready, she says, “Now, we have to be careful, I have acute angina.” The old man says, “You better, because you sure have some ugly tits!!”
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Rest Room Signs
RESTROOM SIGNS Friends don’t let friends take home ugly men —Women’s restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE Remember, it’s not, “How high are you?” it’s “Hi, how are you?” —Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit. —Men’s Room, Linda’s Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, North Carolina To do is to be – Descartes To be is to do – Voltaire Do be…
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