Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Bill: “There are a few issues we need to discuss.” Contractor: “Ah, you have our basic support option. Calls are free for the first 90 days and $75 a call thereafter. Okay?” Bill: “Uh, yeah… the first issue is the living room. We think it’s a little smaller than we anticipated.” Contractor: “Yeah. Some compromises were made to have it out by the release date.” Bill: “We won’t be able to fit all our furniture in there.” Contractor: “Well, you…
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Top Ten Times in history when using the “f” word was appropriate: 10) “What the f**k was that?” – Mayor of Hiroshima 9) “Where did all these f**king Indians come from?” – Custer 8) “Any f**king idiot could understand that.” – Einstein 7) “It does SO f**king look like her!” – Picasso 6) “How the f**k did you work that out?” – Pythagoras 5) “You want WHAT on the f**king ceiling?” – Michaelangelo 4) “I don’t suppose it’s gonna f**king…
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Two priests were done for the day and decided to head for the showers. When they got in they realized neither one had brought soap, so one of them says, “I’ll be alright to go out in the hall naked just to get some soap”, so out he goes and is on his way back with 2 bars of soap when 3 nuns come walking down the hall. The priest froze and pretended he was a statue, with the bars…
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It was the first day of Grade Three in a new town for Dave. As a test, his teacher went around the room and asked each of the students to count to 50. Some did very well, counting as high as 30 or 40 with just a few mistakes. Others couldn’t get past 20. Dave, however, did extremely well; he counted past 50, right up to 100 without any mistakes. He was so excited that he ran home ahd told…
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102 REASONS IT’S GREAT TO BE A GUY. 1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. 2. Movie nudity is virtually always female. 3. You know stuff about tanks. 4. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase. 5. Monday Nite Football. 6. You don’t have to monitor your friends sex lives. 7. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter. 8. You can open all your own jars. 9. Old friends don’t give you crap if you’ve lost or gained…
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Three of the tennis foursome head for the showers after the match. The fourth one just gets into his car and goes home. This happens every week–the same three shower, number four, doesn’t. Finally, one guy asks him why he doesn’t shower after playing tennis; he is, after all, just as hot and sweaty as the other three. “To tell you the truth,” he says, “I’m kind of shy about being naked in front of other guys. To be perfectly…
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This woman goes to a pet store to purchase some dog food. She puts the bag of food up on the counter and notices a box full of frogs. She reads the sign on the box. and it says…”Snatch Eating Frogs $20.00 each comes with instructions)”. She looks at it for a minute…looks around to see if anyone’s watching her… and whispers to the man behind the counter…”I’LL TAKE ONE!” He packages up a frog. The woman grabs her dog…
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Two long-time golfing buddies got to the course one day and decided that this day they would play the ball where it lies…”No matter what!!” On the 14th hole, one of them sliced his drive, and it ended up on the concrete cart path. As he reached down to pick up his ball to get relief, his friend said, “Wait a minute! We agreed that we would not improve our lies, remember? No matter what!” The first player tried to…
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