Ruler Jokes

lots and lots and lots of…you get the picture.

your mom is so fat…she went to Sizzler’s and got a group discount. your mom is so fat…her belt size is equator. your mom is so fat…she was baptised in the pacific ocean. your mom is so stupid, she told me she tripped over a cordless phone. your mom is so old, she walked by an antiqe shop and they put a price tag on her. your mom is so old…she knew god. your mom is so fat, she sat…

(2)Loading...

Read Jokelots and lots and lots of…you get the picture.

The blonde girlfriend

One day a blonde was scratching her boyfriend’s car with a ruler. He came out and told her that rulers are used for measuring how long things are. Not for scratching cars. In the morning he went to wake her for breakfast and had noticed that the ruler was under the bed. He said to her, ” I thought I told you your’re suppose to use a ruler for measuring how long things are.” She replied, ” I know, I…

(3)Loading...

Read JokeThe blonde girlfriend

ya mom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yo mamma — THE LIST YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll…

(7)Loading...

Read Jokeya mom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yo mama

YO MOMMA SO STUPID… Yo momma so stupid, she studied for a drug test! Yo momma so stupid, she thought, “Wu Tang” was an African orange drink! Yo momma so stupid she hears it’s chilly outside so she gets a bowl. Yo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved! Yo momma so stupid that she tried to put M&M’s in alphabetical order! Yo momma so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone! Yo momma…

(0)
Loading...

Read Jokeyo mama

Giving your Cat a Pill, Round 2

1. Pick up cat and cradle it in your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. 2. Retrieve pill from under table and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. 3. Retrieve cat from bedroom and throw…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeGiving your Cat a Pill, Round 2

Yo mamma — THE LIST

YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeYo mamma — THE LIST

Whole Lotta Yo Mama

SO BIG Yo mama’s so big, that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step. Yo mama’s so big, her belly button’s got an echo. Yo mama’s so big, she can’t wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back. Yo mama’s so big, she rollerskates on busses. Yo mama’s so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers. Yo mama’s so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker. Yo mama’s so big, she uses bowling…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeWhole Lotta Yo Mama

Man

If Man is King… And King is Ruler… And a Ruler is 12 Inches… Then Whatever Happened to Man?!?!?!

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeMan

Blonde

Why did a blonde take a ruler to bed? Because she wanted to see how long she would sleep for.

(10)Loading...

Read JokeBlonde