Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Just as a surgeon was finishing up an operation and was about to close, the patient awakes, sits up, and demands to know what is going on. “I’m about to close,” the surgeon says. The patient grabs the surgeon’s hand and says, “I’m not going to let you do that! I’ll close my own incision!” The doctor hands him the needle and thread and says, “Suture self.”
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Three men (John, Bubba, and Mac) died and went to Hell. All three of them were in a very dark and scary room. Suddenly a loud voice boomed out “John, you have been very bad all of your life. For your punsihment, you must live with this woman for all eternity.” Then a 7 foot tall, skinny, ugly woman walked out and John was forced away with her. Bubba and Mac were shaking after seeing what happened and afraid of…
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One day Mom was cleaning her son’s room and in the closet she found a bondage S+M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She hid the magazine until his father got home and showed it to him. He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word. She finally asked him, “Well what should we do about this?” Dad looked at her and said, “Well I don’t think you should spank him.”
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An English professor wrote the words: “A woman without her man is nothing” on the blackboard and directed the students to punctuate it correctly. The men wrote: “A woman, without her man, is nothing.” The women wrote: “A woman. Without her, man is nothing.” Punctuation is everything!
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An English professor wrote the words, “Woman without her man is nothing” on the blackboard and directed his students to punctuate it correctly. The men wrote: “Woman, without her man, is nothing.” The women wrote: “Woman! Without her, man is nothing.”
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A teacher writes the following on the board and asks this blonde to punctuate it: fun fun fun worry worry worry This is what she wrote: “fun PERIOD fun PERIOD fun NO PERIOD worry worry worry!!”
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One witch told another witch, “I want one of those new computers that has a spell checker.” Don’t bother inviting the Invisible Man to your Halloween party. He won’t show up. Sometimes he makes excuses, but they’re all transparent. You don’t have to worry about Daylight Savings Time at Halloween. The holiday is always on Green Witch Mean Time. Western Union opened an office in a graveyard so the spooks could send and receive cryptograms. Vampire pick-up line “What’s your…
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An old man was riding a bus when it pulled to stop for new riders. A punker got on with spiked, yellow-blue and green hair, earrings in the eyes, ears and nose, and tattoos all over his body. The only seat available was right across from the old man. The old man was staring at the punker and after a few minutes the punker hollered, ?Hey you old fart, what are you staring at?? He replied, ? I was in…
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Bill Clinton went to sleep at his desk one afternoon and had a strange dream. In the dream, he died and went to hell. When he gets there, Satan greets him and tells him that he will be there for all eternity, but, because of the way he behaved on earth while living, he gets to choose the type of punishment he will receive. Satan escorts him around and they come to a room where Newt Gingrich is stretched out…
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Three guys were on a trip to Saudi Arabia. One day, they stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the Sheik came in. “I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will be punished in a way corresponding to your profession.” The sheik turns to the…
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