Pantyhose & Animals
QUESTION: How many animals can you fit into a pair of pantyhose? ANSWER: 10 little piggies 2 calves 1 ass 1 beaver an unknown number of hares and a fish no one can find.
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Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Pant Jokes - page 2
Snoring Prevention
By the time the sailor pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken. “You’ve got to have a room somewhere,” he pleaded. “Or just a bed, I don’t care where. “Well, I do have a double room with one occupant – an Air Force guy,” admitted the manager, “and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I’m…
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Why are men…
Why are men like lawn mowers? If you’re not pushing one around, then you’re riding it. Why is a hard man good to find? You don’t have to stay up half the night massaging his ego. How is an ex-husband like an inflamed appendix? It caused you a lot of pain, and after it was removed you found out you didn’t need it anyway. What do men and pantyhose have in common? They either cling, run or don’t fit right…
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Top Ten Reasons To Change Banks
1. The teller says, “Welcome to Burger… First State Bank, may I take your order?” 2. Founders: Dowee, Cheetum, and Howe. 3. Interest Rate on loans: 40.99 % 4. Bank run out of double-wide trailer. Which has been blown over FIVE times. 5. Slogan: “We want your money… uh business.” 6. Instead of candy kids get their very own HAPPY pills. 7. All cash deposits go directly into teller’s pants. 8. Valuables safely stored in a Pizza Hut box. 9.…
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Great Dentist
A guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go back to the girl’s place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes off his pants and washes his hands. The girl watches him and says, “You must be a dentist.” The guy, surprised, says, “Yes…how did you figure that out?” The girl says, “Easy…you keep washing your hands.” One thing…
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yo mama is so stupid
Yo mama is so stupid that she dialed 911 on the microwave. Yo mama is so stupid she stole free bread. Yo mama is so stupid she got locked in a Grocery store and starved. Yo mama is so stupid she got locked in the Bathroom and peeded in her pants.
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Two Nuns
Two nuns went out of the convent to sell cookies. One of them is known as Sister Mathematical (SM) and the other one is known as Sister Logical (SL). It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent. SL: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the past half-hour? SM: Yes, I wonder what he wants. SL: It’s logical. He wants to have his way with us. SM: Oh, no! At this…
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Puppy Smuggling
A traveling salesman had been on the road for two months and was finally on his way home. Feeling bad about having been away from his children so long, he decided to buy them a gift. So he stopped by a pet store and bought them a cute little puppy. Unfortunately, he was stopped on his way in by a stewardess who told him, “I’m sorry, Sir, but we don’t allow animals.” In desperation, the man popped into the men’s…
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Santa’s Pissed!
‘Twas the night before Christmas, Old Santa was pissed, He cussed out the elves, And threw down his list, “Miserable little pricks, Ungrateful little jerks, I have good mind, To scrap the whole works! I’ve busted my ass, For damn near a year, Instead of ‘Thanks Santa,’ What do I hear? The old lady bitches, ‘Cause I work late at night, The elves want more money, The reindeer all fight. Rudolph got drunk, And goosed all the maids, Donner is…
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Wanna bite?
As they drove through the training area on their annual inspection, the proud Officer in Charge of the training base waved a hand toward the field and said to the General, “We are extremely proud of our camoflauge training, Sir. Our soldiers blend into the background, completely invisible to the enemy. As a matter of fact, there are over a hundred men hidden in this field and I’m sure even a veteran soldier like yourself cannot detect one . .…
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