juice
Why did the orange stop crossing the road? Because it ran out of juice
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Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Orange juice Jokes
15 Yo Mama’s
1) Yo momma’s so fat she’s got more crack than Harlem! 2) Yo momma’s so stupid she tried to take a Chia pet for a walk! 3) Yo momma’s so stupid she thought Hamburger Helper came with somebody! 4) Yo momma’s arm pits are so hairy she looks like she has Don King in a headlock! 5) Yo momma’s so cheap she charged admission to the Thanksgiving dinner! 6) Yo momma’s so stupid she tried to study for a blood…
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They help her sleep
An elderly woman went into the doctor’s office. When the doctor asked why she was there, she replied, “I’d like to have some birth control pills.” Taken aback, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, “Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, but you’re 72 years old. What possible use could you have for birth control pills?” The woman responded, “They help me sleep better.” The doctor thought some more and continued, “How in the world do birth control pills help…
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Redneck
You might be a redneck if…. One morning you’re sitting at the breakfast table staring at your orange juice because it says concentrate. Instead of taking your pants to get hemmed you walk them off. Your family tree goes straight up. The family business is Billy Bob’s Taxidermy Service.
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Bed and Breakfast
This guy and his newlywed wife go to the Hilton for their honeymoon night. At the front desk, they check in and the receptionist gives the groom the key to the bridal suite. Just then he says to the groom, “Sir, It is now 6 o’ clock, dinner will be served from 7:30 onwards.” The groom looks at him and says, “Thank you, but we won’t be needing any” and off he and his bride go to the room. The…
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68 FUN THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations. 2. Ride those electronic cars at the front of the store. 3. Set all the alarm clock to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day. 4. Start playing football; see how many people you can get to join in. 5. Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him, “I need some…
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HOW blonde was she?
She was sooooooooooooooo blonde, She sent me a fax with a stamp on it. She thought a quarterback was a refund. She tried to put M&M’s in alphabetical order. She thought Boyz II Men was a day care center. She thought Eartha Kitt was a set of garden tools. She thought General Motors was in the army. She thought “Meow Mix” was a CD for cats. She thought TuPac Shakur was a Jewish holiday. Under “education” on her job application,…
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yo mama
yo mama so fat, she fell in love and broke it. yo mama so fat she fell into the sea and the whales sang, “We are family…” yo mama so stupid she spent 20 min. staring at an orange juice carton cause it said, “Concentrate.” yo mama so ugly when she was born the doctor looked at her head and butt and said, “Twins!”
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A Perfect Day…
THE PERFECT DAY – FOR HER -8.15 Wake up to hugs and kisses -8.30 Weigh in 2Kg lighter than yesterday -8.45 Breakfast in bed, freshly squeezed orange juice and croissants; open presents – expensive jewelery chosen by thoughtful partner -9.15 Soothing hot bath with frangipani bath oil -10.00 Light work out at club with handsome funny personal trainer -10.30 Facial, manicure, shampoo, condition, blow dry -12.00 Lunch with best friend at fashionable outdoor cafe -12.45 Catch sight of husband/ boyfriend’s…
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Insider’s Guide To The Male Vocabulary
“Haven’t I seen you before?” (“Nice ass!”) “I’m a Romantic.” (“I haven’t got a dime.”) “I need you.” (“My hand is tired.”) “I am different from all the other guys.” (“I’m not circumcised.”) “I want a commitment.” (“I’m sick of masturbation.”) “You’re the only girl I’ve ever cared about.” (“You are the only girl who hasn’t rejected me.”) “I really want to get to know you better.” (“So I can tell my friends about it.”) “It’s just orange juice, try…
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