One man Jokes

Pope Leo Thinks Humanity Is ‘In Big Trouble’ Over One Tech Mogul’s Trillion-Dollar Pay

Pope Leo Thinks Humanity Is ‘In Big Trouble’ Over One Tech Mogul’s Trillion-Dollar Pay. It seems even the holiest of figures can’t ignore the sheer absurdity of modern wealth! ? During his very first media interview, a concerned religious leader — known for his humble lifestyle — declared that humanity is facing ‘big trouble’. His divine consternation was sparked by the ever-growing chasm between the ultra-rich and, well, everyone else. Specifically, he pointed to one particular tech visionary who is…

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Airman Jones’s Great Sales Pitch

Airman Jones was assigned to the induction center where he was to advise new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance. It wasn’t long before Captain Smith noticed that Airman Jones had almost a 100% record for insurance sales, which had never happened before. Rather than ask about this, the Captain stood in the back of the room and listened to Jones’s sales pitch. Jones explained the basics of the GI Insurance to the new recruits, and then…

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Money Man

There’s a man who makes money but does not spend it. So he goes home to his wife and says “I saved $5.00 by chasing a bus and not riding it.” So the wife says “You retard you could have saved $15.00 by chasing a taxi not a cheap old bus!”

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Guano-Gate: Rome Woman Banned as Neighbors Drown in ‘Hitchcockian Pigeon Hell’

? Breaking News from the Eternal City! A Rome woman has been officially banned from feeding her feathered friends after neighbours declared their apartment block a literal ‘Hitchcockian pigeon hell.’ Talk about taking ‘going to the birds’ a bit too far! ? Rome’s mayor, no doubt accustomed to dealing with ancient ruins and traffic, has now had to step in to stop the avian apocalypse. Furious residents claimed they were quite literally drowning in feathers and guano (that’s fancy bird…

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Can a Woman Keep a Secret?

At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing whether men or women were more trustworthy. “No woman,” said one man, scornfully, “can keep a secret.” “I don’t know about that,” huffily answered a woman guest. “I have kept my age a secret since I was twenty-one.” “You’ll let it out some day,” the man insisted. “I hardly think so!” responded the lady. “When a woman has kept a secret for twenty-seven years, she can keep it forever.”

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A Man in Uniform

A police officer, though scheduled for all-night duty at the station, was relieved of duty early and arrived home four hours ahead of schedule at 2 a.m. Not wanting to wake his wife, he undressed in the dark, crept into the bedroom and started to climb into bed. She sleepily sat up and said, “Mike, Dearest, would you go down to the all-night drug store on the next block and get me some aspirin? I’ve got a splitting headache.” “Certainly,…

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Everyone Knows Mozart

A married couple, trying to live up to a snobbish lifestyle, went to this party. The conversation turned to Mozart. “Absolutely brilliant, magnificent, a genius!” The woman, wanting to join in the conversation, remarked casually, “Ah, Mozart. You’re so right. I love him. Only this morning, I saw him getting on the No. 5 bus going to Coney Island.” There was a sudden hush, and everyone looked at her. Her husband was mortified. He pulled her away and whispered, “We’re…

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Balloon Management

A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realises he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts: “Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?” The man below says: “Yes you’re in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field.” “You must work in Information Technology,” says the balloonist. “I do,” replies the man. “How did you know?” “Well,” says the balloonist, “everything you…

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