Old couple Jokes

Old couple at the gas station

An old man and his hard-of-hearing wife were traveling through the south when they stopped at a gas station to refuel. The attendant asked, “How much, sir?” and the old man told him to fill it up. Immediately the old woman piped up, “What did he say?” and the old man shouted that he’d told him to fill up the tank. The attendant then asked if he needed the oil checked and the old man replied that it was fine.…

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Read JokeOld couple at the gas station

Old Couple

It was this old couple’s aniversary. The old man was in bed reading the newspaper when his wife said, “How do you like my suit?” Her husband replies, “What suit?” She says, “My EVE suit!” He looks at her and says, “I think you forgot to iron it, it’s wrinkled.”

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The Old Couple goes to the Doc

This old man in his eighty’s got up and was putting on his coat. His wife say, “Where are you going?” He replies, “I’m going to the doctor.” She says, “Why, are you sick?” “No” he responds, “I’m going to get me some of those new Viagra pills.” So his wife gets up out of her rocker and was putting on her sweater and he says, “Where are you going?” She says, “I’m going to the doctor too!” “Why?” he…

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The Old Couple

While on a car trip, an elderly couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. After finished their meal, the elderly woman left her glasses on the table, but she didn’t miss them until they were back on the highway. By then, they had to travel quite a distance before they could find a place to turn around. The elderly man fussed and complained all the way back to the restaurant. He called his wife every bad name he could…

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A Very Brave Soldier, Indeed

A Navy Admiral, a Marine General and an Army General were having some drinks at the officer’s club in a major military base. After a few rounds of iced tea, the Navy Admiral boasted, “You know, the Navy has the bravest fighting men ever to serve in the Armed Forces. I can prove it to you all.” Before the others could protest, the Admiral proceeded to phone his headquarter and asked for the best Navy Seal in his command to…

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FAMILY COUPLE

One day there was this old married couple and they were driving after having a fight. After awhile they pass a pig farm.The wife says to her husband “Relatives?” He says “Yeah,Inlaws”

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Read JokeFAMILY COUPLE

The Couple in Heaven

An 85-year-old couple, after being happily married for almost 60 years, died together in a car crash. They had been in good health the last ten years, mainly due to the wife’s interest in health food and proper diet. When they reached the Pearly Gates, St. Peter took them to their luxury mansion, which was decked out with a beautiful kitchen, master bedroom suite and a fancy in-house jacuzzi. The old man asked St. Peter how much all this was…

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A Scottish Couple

Mary and Jamie are courtin and Mary says to Jamie “Jamie would ya like to hold me hand?” Jamie says ” Oh, I would how’d you know” “I can tell by the look in yer eye” says Mary They walk a little bit further and Jamie turns to Mary and says ” Mary would you like it if I gave ya a wee kiss?” Jamie “Oh, I would how’d ya know?” Mary ” I can tell by the look in…

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Elderly Couple

An elderly couple was on a cruise and it was really stormy. They were standing on the back of the boat watching the moon when a wave came up and washed the old woman overboard. They searched for days and couldn’t find her so the captain sent the old man back to shore with the promise that he would notify him as soon as they found something. Three weeks went by and finally the old man got a fax from…

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Read JokeElderly Couple

Holding Hands

An older couple regularly attended church. The pastor was much impressed by how harmonious and how much in love they seemed. They always held hands all through the service. One day after church, the pastor couldn’t resist going up to them to express his admiration. He said, “I find it so inspirational to see how deeply in love you are, even after all these years, holding hands the way you do.” The wife looked up sharply and said, “It’s not…

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