O j simpson Jokes

D’oh! The Simpsons Movie Sequel Finally Arrives Two Decades Later (Fans Wonder if Homer Remembers the Plot)

The Simpsons Movie Sequel Finally Arrives Two Decades Later, proving that good things (or at least, long-awaited things) come to those who wait… and wait… and wait some more. ? The much-anticipated (or perhaps, by now, casually remembered) film is slated for release in 2027, precisely 20 years after the original cinematic masterpiece that briefly took Springfield to the big screen. Imagine that – 20 years! That’s enough time for Maggie to go through college, Bart to finally finish fourth…

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Read JokeD’oh! The Simpsons Movie Sequel Finally Arrives Two Decades Later (Fans Wonder if Homer Remembers the Plot)

The Wisdom of Homer J. Simpson

“Now son, you don’t want to drink beer. That’s for Daddies, and kids with fake IDs.” “Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.” “Maybe, just once, someone will call me ‘sir’ without adding, ‘You’re making a scene!’” “Marge, don’t discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It’s what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel.” “If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now…

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Read JokeThe Wisdom of Homer J. Simpson

No Offense, West Virginians

A West Virginia State trooper pulls over a pickupon I-79. He says to the driver, “Got any ID?” The driver says, “‘Bout what?” ———————————— Q: Did you hear about the $3,000,000 West Virginia State Lottery? A: The winner gets $3 a year for a million years. ———————————— Q: Why did O.J. Simpson want to move to southern West Virginia? A: He heard that everyone has the same DNA. ———————————— Q: Did you hear that the governor’s mansion in Charleston, WV…

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Read JokeNo Offense, West Virginians

Some Old, Some New, All Bad

Q: What’s the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scotsman? A: One says “Hey, you, get off of my cloud.” The other says, “Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe.” Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? A: One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with…. the other is used to carry groceries. Q: How do you recycle toilet paper? A: Hang it on the wall and bash the…

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Read JokeSome Old, Some New, All Bad

Famous Quotes About Drinking…..

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. –Ernest Hemmingway Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. –Winston Churchill He was a wise man, who invented beer. –Plato Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink. –Lady Astor to Winston Churchill Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it. –Churchill’s reply When I read about…

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Read JokeFamous Quotes About Drinking…..

Do Re Mi, Homer style

by Homer J. Simpson Do…the stuff that buys me beer Re…the guy who sells me beer Me…the guys who drinks the beer Far…a long way to get beer So…I’ll have another beer La…I’ll have another beer Tea…no thanks, I’m drinking beer That will bring us back to… (Looks into an empty bottle of beer..) D’OH!!

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Read JokeDo Re Mi, Homer style