Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Perhaps one of the most interesting words in the English language today is the word “fuck.” Out of all the English words that begin with the letter “F”, fuck is the only word that is referred to as the “f” word. It’s one magical word. Just by its sound it can describe pain, pleasure, hate, and love. Fuck, as most words in the English language, is derived from German — the word ‘flicken’ which means to strike. In English fuck…
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“Dad,” said the boy, “we had a spelling contest in school today, and I missed on the very first word.” “That’s too bad, Son,” consoled the father. “What was the word?” “Posse.” “Well, no wonder you couldn’t spell it, Lunkhead. You can’t even pronounce it correctly!”
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01. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup. 02. Make yourself at home! Clean my kitchen. 03. Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mom? 04. A hard-on doesn’t count as personal growth. 05. Don’t bother me. I’m living happily ever after. 06. Do I look like a fricking people person? 07. This isn’t an office. It’s Hell with fluorescent lighting. 08. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left. 09.…
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A magazine recently ran a “Dilbert quotes” contest. They were looking for people to submit quotes from their real life managers. Here are the Top 12 finalists: 1. As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday and employees will receive their cards in two weeks.(This was the winning quote from Fred Dales at Microsoft Corp. in Redmond, WA.) 2. What I need is a list of…
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Little Johnny goes to school, and the teacher says “Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?” Little Johnny waves his hand, “Me, miss, me, me!” Teacher says “All right, little Johnny, what is your multi- syllable word?” Little Johnny says “Mas-tur-bate.” Teacher smiles and says “Wow, little Johnny, that’s a mouthful.” Little Johnny says “No, miss, you’re thinking of a blowjob. I’m talking about a wank.”
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I was reading in the paper today and I guess about a week ago this guy was trying to hire somebody to kill his wife. So he called up this Mafia guy named Arty. He asked Arty, “How much it would cost to kill my wife?” “A dollar,” Arty replied. So the guy said, “Every Tuesday my wife goes to Consumers at 6:00 and you can?t miss her cause she?s blonde and she drives a red sports car.” So the…
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It was a warm Friday afternoon toward the end of the school year when Miss Adams said to her third-grade class “Give me your attentions, girls and boys. I’m going to write some quotations on the board and the first person who can tell me who said each one may leave early today.” She wrote “Give me liberty or give…” Before she could finish the phrase, little Tiffany shouted “Patrick Henry”. “Very good, Tiffany”, smiled Miss Adams. “You may leave.”…
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A man was sitting alone at the bar looking so sad and forlorn. He had a glass of beer in front of him but he did not touch the glass for more than half an hour. Just then a burly, mean biker approached the sad man, grabbed the glass and drank all the content. As the biker wiped off the beer suds from his mouth, the man began to cry. The biker laughed and said, “Hey, man, I was just…
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(ACTUAL NOTES–UNEDITED!): 1. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year 2. On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely. 3. She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night. 4. The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1997. 5. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also…
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