Goo Jokes

A lady from Chicago was visiting New York City. Her hostess was determined to make the Midwesterner feel inferior and unimportant. “My dear,” said the New York matron, snobbishly, “Here in the East we think breeding is everything.” “Oh, I don’t know,” the lady from the Midwest replied. “Out where I come from, we think it’s fun, too, but we try to have a few outside interests as well.”

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The customer in the Italian restaurant was so pleased that he asked to speak to the chef. The owner proudly led him into the kitchen and introduced him to the chief. “Your veal parmigiana was superb,” the customer said. “I just spent a month in Italy, and yours is better than any I ever had over there.” “Naturally,” the chef said. “Over there, they use domestic cheese. Ours is imported.”

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An armless man walks into a bar which is empty except for the bartender. He orders a drink, and when he is served, asks the bartender if he will get the money from his wallet in his pocket, since he has no arms. The bartender obliges him. He then asks if the bartender will tip the glass to his lips. The bartender does this until the man finishes his drink. After this, he asks the bartender if he will get…

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