Goo Jokes

Prince William’s Royal ‘Change for Good’ Agenda: Top Priority? Making His Son Proud (and Maybe Less Press Intrusion, Eventually)

Prince William’s Royal ‘Change for Good’ Agenda: Top Priority? Making His Son Proud (and Maybe Less Press Intrusion, Eventually) ? In what can only be described as a masterclass in royal PR, William sat down with none other than ‘Schitt’s Creek’ legend and ‘Reluctant Traveler’ Eugene Levy. The future king shared his grand vision for an ‘agenda of change for the good’ when he ascends the throne. ? Among these lofty goals, it seems a significant one is doing work…

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Read JokePrince William’s Royal ‘Change for Good’ Agenda: Top Priority? Making His Son Proud (and Maybe Less Press Intrusion, Eventually)

Good News, Bad News

A man went to his doctor for a check up. At the end of the appointment his doctor said, ” I have some good news and some bad news.” The man said, “What’s the bad news?” The doctor said, “You have 3 days to live.” Frantic, the man asked,” And what’s the good news?” The doctor replied, “You know the receptionist with the humongous tits? I’m f*cking her.”

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Read JokeGood News, Bad News

Good Breeding

A lady from Chicago was visiting New York City. Her hostess was determined to make the Midwesterner feel inferior and unimportant. “My dear,” said the New York matron, snobbishly, “Here in the East we think breeding is everything.” “Oh, I don’t know,” the lady from the Midwest replied. “Out where I come from, we think it’s fun, too, but we try to have a few outside interests as well.”

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Good Italian Food

The customer in the Italian restaurant was so pleased that he asked to speak to the chef. The owner proudly led him into the kitchen and introduced him to the chief. “Your veal parmigiana was superb,” the customer said. “I just spent a month in Italy, and yours is better than any I ever had over there.” “Naturally,” the chef said. “Over there, they use domestic cheese. Ours is imported.”

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A good date

Three girls in college were all out at dates. One was a Brunette, another was a Red head and the last was a blonde. They returned at the same time and the Brunette said, “You know its a good date when your hair is messed up” The red head said “No, you know its a good date when your lip stick is all sumged” The blonde ripped off her panties and threw them against the wall where they stuck and…

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Goodbye, Charlie

When Charles deGaulle decided to retire from public life, the American Ambassador to France threw a gala dinner party at the Embassy in his honor. At the dinner table, the Ambassador’s wife was chatting with Madame deGaulle. “Madame,” she began, “Your husband has been such a prominent figure in the world for so long, first as a great General, then as President of the Republic, now as a statesman, what are you most looking forward to in your retirement years?”…

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GOOD NEWS

A lovely blonde had just had a complete physical after having missed two consecutive menstrual periods. “Well, Mrs. Appleby,” smiled her doctor. “I have good news for you.” “Wait, Doctor,” she interrupted. “It’s not MRS. Appleby…it’s MISS Appleby.” “Oh,” said the doctor. “In that case, Miss Appleby, I have bad news for you.”

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Good Samaritan’s Limits

An armless man walks into a bar which is empty except for the bartender. He orders a drink, and when he is served, asks the bartender if he will get the money from his wallet in his pocket, since he has no arms. The bartender obliges him. He then asks if the bartender will tip the glass to his lips. The bartender does this until the man finishes his drink. After this, he asks the bartender if he will get…

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Good News Nurse

There is a guy who begins to suffer massive headaches. He goes to the doctor and says, “Hey doc, I?ve got these headaches… can you check it out and tell me what?s going on?” Doc says, “Sure, come on back in a couple days after we analyze some tests.” Guy comes back, and the doctor tells him, “We?ve got good news and bad news.” Guy says, “Let?s hear the bad news.” Doc sez, “You?ve got a week to live.” Guy…

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