Gent Jokes

Dua Lipa ‘Categorically’ Denies Agent Fired for Being Anti-Kneecap (Yes, That’s the Band’s Name)

Dua Lipa ‘Categorically’ Denies Agent Fired for Being Anti-Kneecap (Yes, That’s the Band’s Name). The pop star and her talent agency are scrambling to clarify that reports of her sacking agent, a man named David Levy, are ‘categorically false.’ Apparently, the rumor mill had her giving him the boot because he allegedly signed a letter urging Glastonbury to drop a pro-Palestine Irish rap group called Kneecap from its lineup. ? So, to be clear, no one’s getting kneecapped over Kneecap……

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Read JokeDua Lipa ‘Categorically’ Denies Agent Fired for Being Anti-Kneecap (Yes, That’s the Band’s Name)

Teaching Him to be a Gentleman

US humorist, illustrator and poet Oliver Herford was traveling on a trolley one day with his young nephew on his lap. The car was so crowded that when an attractive blonde entered, she was obliged to stand. Herford have her an admiring look and said to his nephew, “My boy, why don’t you get up and give the lady your seat?”

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No Gentleman

A pretty woman, carrying a stack of boxes from a shopping spree, was walking down the street when, all of a sudden, a strong gust of wind lifts her skirt. The hillbilly standing nearby just looked and smiled. The woman snaps at him, “Well, I can see that YOU’RE no gentleman!!!” The hillbilly says, “And I can see you ain’t one, neither!”

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Urgent Personal Need

A man took his wife to a Broadway show. During the first intermission, he needed to find the restroom in the worst way, so he hurriedly left the auditorium. He searched in vain for one and couldn’t locate any. Finally, he stumbled across a beautiful fountain with foliage, and since nobody was watching, he decided to relieve himself right there. When he made it back into the auditorium, the second act had already begun. He searched in the dark until…

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IRS Agent at the Bank

In a long line of people waiting for a bank teller, one guy suddenly started massaging the back of the person in front of him. Surprised, the man in front turned and snarled, “Just what the hell are you doing?” “Well,” said the guy, “you see, I’m a chiropractor and I could see that you were tense, so I had to massage your back. Sometimes I just can’t help practicing my art!” “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard!” the…

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Intelligent Hunting Dog

A farmer was down on his luck having suffered a bad growing season, lack of crops and poor prices. To make ends meet he decided he’d have to sell his dog – a most intelligent animal. A few days after placing the ad, a man came to see this “intelligent” dog. When asked what the dog could do, the farmer pointed to a stand of trees nearby and informed the man there was a pond on the other side. He…

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Bill’s Parrot

Bill buys a parrot for his family in the White House one day. So they go on a vacation and Bill tells the secret service to keep good care of it. While away the bird dies, so the secret service go in and out of every pet shop looking for a new parrot. One agent goes into a pet shop and sees the same exact bird. Markings and everything. So he goes to the owner and says, “Sir, I need…

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Read JokeBill’s Parrot