Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
These epitaphs were taken from actual tombstones: On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia: “Here lies Ezekial Aikle Age 102 The Good Die Young.” In a London, England cemetery: “Here lies Ann Mann, Who lived an old maid, But died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767” In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery: “The children of Israel wanted bread And the Lord sent them manna, Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife, And the Devil sent him Anna.”…
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A young tough robbed an elderly gentleman walking in his neighborhood. A week later he sees the gentleman walking again but this time he has a small dog that looks like a dachshund. The young tough decides to rob him again but decides to get a ferocious dog to take along. A few days later he sees the man walking with his dog and takes his dog to rob him. As he approaches, the elderly gentleman’s dog grabs the ferocious…
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Q & A Q:How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? A:Tell him a joke on Thursday. Q:A blonde is going to London on a plane, how can you steal her window seat? A:Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row. Q:Why did God give blondes 2% more brains than horses? A:Because he didn’t want them shitting in the streets during parades. Q:Why can’t blondes make ice cubes? A:They always forget the…
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One fine summer day three newfies decided to move to Alberta and find work. The first place they stopped at was Alberta Power and applied for labourer positions. The foreman for Alberta Power asked them if they had ever planted power line poles before to which they replied, “No bye, but we’s be fast learners and quick too.” So the foreman said, “Alright, show up tomorrow morning and I’ll give you a try.” The next morning the three newfies showed…
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An African man is in the desert dying of thirst when he happens to come across a bottle. He opens it and out pops a genie. The grateful genie tells him that he will grant the man three wishes. The man immediately replies, “For my first wish, I want water. For my second wish, I want to be white. For my last wish, since I have not seen a woman for quite some time, I wish to see buttocks every…
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A man walks into a supermarket in downtown L.A. and heads straight to the produce section. After looking at the heads of fresh lettuce on display, the customer approaches the store clerk and asks, “Excuse me. Can I buy half a head of lettuce?” Shaking his head, the clerk says, “I’m sorry. But we sell those by the whole head.” “But I don’t need a whole head, just half. C’mon surely you can accommodate my simple request,” insists the customer.…
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A bloke goes into a pub, takes a seat at the bar, and orders five pints. The barman gives him an odd look since the bloke’s all by himself, but he serves up the five pints and lines them up on the bar. The bloke downs them . . . One, Two, Three, Four, Five. He finishes the last one and calls to the barman: “Four pints, please, mate!” The barman serves up four more pints and lines them up…
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There was this girl who had breasts on her back instead of the front. The guys all thought she looked funny but was fun to dance with.
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A tourist was passing through a small town one day. He went into a tavern to get a beer and he saw all the locals sitting around shouting out numbers and laughing. He asked a man at the table next to him what was going on. The guy answered “We’ve been telling the same jokes over and over for years now, so for convenience we’ve numbered all our jokes. We simply yell out the number instead of telling the entire…
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One day, an immigrant from Poland entered a New York City Police Precinct to report that his American wife was planning to kill him. The police officer on duty was intrigued by this and he asked, “How sure are ya that she is gonna kill ya? Did she threaten to kill ya?” “No,” replied the nervous immigrant. “Did ya hear her tell someone else that she’s gonna kill ya?” “No.” “Did someone tell ya that your wife is gonna kill…
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