Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Joe and Marion had been married 50 years and were celebrating with a champagne breakfast. Joe looks across the table at Marion with a gleam in his eye and says “Do you remember what we did at our first breakfast after we were married?” Marion smiles and says “Well, I think we didn’t even put our nightclothes back on after our honeymoon night. If I remember right, we had breakfast together stark naked.” “How about we do that right now?”…
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A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk I have a work station… What hair color do they put on the driver’s licenses of bald men? Can atheists get insurance for acts of God? If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it FedUP? If Stop & Shop and the A&P were to merge would it be called Stop & P? I believe five out of…
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A guy died, went to hell, and was greeted by the devil. The devil led him to a hallway and told him to choose 1 of 3 rooms to spend the rest of eternity in. He opened the first door to find a group of people standing on their heads on a wood floor. He thought that looked extremely uncomfortable, so he opened the second door. Here he found a group of people standing on their heads on a concrete…
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Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs are. The first man was an Engineer, the second was an Accountant, the third was a Chemist, and the fourth man was a Government Worker. To show off, the Engineer called to his dog. “T-Square, do your stuff.” T-Square trotted over to a desk, took out some paper and a pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart. The Accountant said his…
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Memo to: the Director Subject: Letter of Recommendation 1> Bob Smith, an assistant programmer, can always be found 2> hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works independently, without 3> wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never 4> thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always 5> finishes given assignments on time. Often Bob takes extended 6> measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping 7> coffee breaks. Bob is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no 8> vanity…
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Three girls all worked in the same office with the same female boss. Each day they noticed the boss left work early. One day, the girls decided that when the boss left, they would leave right behind her. After all, she never called or came back to work, so how would she know they went home early? The brunette was thrilled to be home early. She did a little gardening, spent playtime with her son, and went to bed early.…
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How do you confuse a blonde boy? You put him in a circular room and tell him to pee in the corner. Why do blondes wear underwear? To keep their ankles warm. Why did eighteen blondes go to the movies? Because the sign said, “Seventeen and under not admitted.” What do you call a blonde holding a dollar over her head All you can eat under a buck A dumb blonde and a smart blonde jump off of a roof.…
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So there’s this nun who teaches first graders. On the first day of class the nun calls out all of the children’s names, except she notices that all the way in the back of the classroom there’s this little girl who never raised her hand. So the nun goes over to the little girl and asks her “Little girl, what is your name?” and the little girl responds “My name is Helen Fuckhour.” The nun says to the little girl…
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A man goes to hell and shows up in front of three doors. The devil pops up and says, “You have a choice here behind these doors for what you want to do for eternity.” The man thinks this is fair and looks behind the first door and sees many people on a hot metal floor, standing on their heads and screaming. He quickly slams the door saying,”NOT THAT!” The man looks behind the second and sees many people standing…
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1. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings…they did it by killing all those who opposed them. 2. If you can stay calm, while all around you is chaos…then you probably haven’t completely understood the seriousness of the situation. 3. Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG fourteen times gives you job security. 4. Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines. 5. Artificial Intelligence is…
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