Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A shapely lady in a bikini walked into the ocean to take a swim. A large wave came up and washed over her, tearing off her bikini top. She came out of the surf with her arms folded across her chest. A little boy playing in the sand looked up at her and said, “Lady, if you’re going to drown those puppies, I’ll take the one with the brown nose.”
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What to wear often has implications — depending on the generation involved. A 16-year-old girl buys herself a very skimpy bikini. Modeling it for her mother, she asks: “So, Mom, what do you think?” Her mother replies, “I think that if I had worn that when I was your age, you’d be five years older!”
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Q- How did Bill Clinton win presidental elections? A- With the help of his wife Hillary. She first shaved her bikini line, went to give speech in front of public, lifted her skirt and said: “Read my lips no more Bush”
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Gloria, a very attractive, very well built blonde, has decided to spend her vacation in Cancun this year to be near the beach. The first morning, she takes the elevator to the roof of the hotel where she covers herself with sunscreen and sunbathes in her bikini. That evening, she notices that the bikini has left a noticeable tan line. So the next morning, she puts on a terry robe and goes up to the roof without her bikini. She…
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How To Shower Like A Woman: 1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom. 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so you can complain and whine even more about how you’re getting fat. 4. Get in the shower.…
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Two priests were going to Hawaii on vacation and decided that they would make this a real vacation by not wearing anything that would identify them as clergy. As soon as the plane landed, they headed for a store and bought some really outrageous shorts and shirts, sandals, sunglasses, etc. The next morning, they went to the beach, dressed in their “tourist”garb and were sitting on beach chairs, enjoying a drink, the sunshine and the scenery when a “drop dead”…
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The Top 39 Things You Would NEVER Hear A Texan Say: 39. “I’ll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex”. 38. Duct tape won’t fix that. 37. Lisa Marie was lucky to catch Michael. 36. Come to think of it, I’ll have a Heineken. 35. We don’t keep firearms in this house. 34. Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer? 33. You can’t feed that to the dog. 32. I thought Graceland was tacky. 31. No kids in the back of the pick-up,…
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(Actual excerpts from classified sections of city newspapers) Illiterate? Write today for free help. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you’ll never go anywhere again. Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it. Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel. Stock up and save. Limit: one. Semi-Annual…
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Why does a man have a clear conscience? Because it’s never used. Why are men so happy? Because ignorance is bliss. Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for a man, than for a women? Because when it’s time to go back to childhood, he’s already there. How do men exercise at the beach? By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a woman in a bikini. What’s the difference between government bonds and men? Bonds mature. How many men…
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Top 39 things you would NEVER hear a Southerner say ever, no matter how much they’ve had to drink, no matter how far from the South they’ve wandered and no matter how much the skunks are threatening… ****************************************************** 39. I’ll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex. 38. Duct tape won’t fix that. 37. Lisa Marie was lucky to catch Michael. 36. Come to think of it, I’ll have a Heineken. 35. We don’t keep firearms in this house. 34. Has anybody…
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