Barstool Jokes

The Barstool

Three blondes go to a bar. There is one barstool left, and no tables. They all want to sit together, but again, there is only one barstool. Question: How can they all still sit together? Blonde Answer: Turn the barstool upside down, and sit on the stool legs.

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Duck Food

A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender, “Do you have any duck food?” The bartender yells at him, “No, you stupid duck. This is a bar. Of course we don’t have any duck food. Now get out of here, and don’t ever come back!” The next day the same duck walks into the same bar, and says to the bartender, “Hey, do you have any duck food?” The bartender yells at him, “No! I told you…

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The Little Blue Smurf

A little blue smurf walked into a bar and hit his hand on the bar. The bartender then put a beer in front of the smurf and carried on making drinks for the others at the bar. A biker noticed but didn’t say anything. About five minutes later, the smurf jumped on the bar and took a swig of his beer. The biker laughed, and the smurf stared at him. The little blue creature then ran down the bar, stuck…

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Drinking Regulation

Two lesbians walk into a bar, and take a seat on a couple of barstools. After a moment, the bartender notices them, and comes over. “We’ll have a couple of 14 year-old’s,” says one of them. The bartender looks at them disgustedly, and says, “Sorry, we don’t serve minors to liquors.”

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Frog and a Hamster in a Bar

This mangy-lookin’ guy goes into a bar and orders a drink. The bar-tender says “No way. I don’t think you can pay for it.” The guy says “You’re right. I don’t have any money, but if I show you something you haven’t seen before, will you give me a drink?” The bartender says “Only if what you show me ain’t risque.” “Deal!” says the guy, as he reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a hamster. He puts the…

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