Jokes News

Every night Frank would leave work, go home and watch TV. One night, as he finished his beer, the doorbell rang. He answered the door and found a six-foot cockroach standing there. The bug grabbed him by the collar and threw him across the room and then left.

The next night, again after finishing his beer, the doorbell rang. The same six-foot cockroach standing there. This time he was slugged on the forehead causing him to see stars.

The next night, after he finished his beer, the doorbell rang again. The same six-foot cockroach standing there. This time the bug punched him in the stomach and then left.

Thinking it might be the beer, the fourth night Frank didn’t drink at all; The doorbell rang. The six-foot cockroach standing there.

The bug beat the snot out of Frank and left him in a heap on the living room floor. Thoroughly confused, the following day Frank went to see his doctor.

He explained the events of the preceding four nights. “What can I do?” he pleaded.

“Not much” answered the doctor.
“There’s just a nasty bug going around.”

A disabled swimming class is currently on at a swimming pool and a group of cripples are crowding round the pool.

“I’ll bet I can swim two lengths in a minute,” says a man with one arm.

He jumps in and swims the two lengths in just under one minute.

“That’s nothing, I can do it less than that,” says a man with no arms.

He jumps in and struggles through the two lengths in a better time to the amazement of the crowd.

“Huh, I can do better than that,” says a man with no arms or legs.

He flops in and in an amazing feat of effort beats the previous time.

As the crowd congratulate the legless and armless man, a head with no body, pulling itself along by the tongue butts into the crowd.

“I’ll beat even that time,” he says.

He drags himself to the edge of the pool and drops in but sinks straight to the bottom.

An able bodied man jumps in and pulls him out. “What happened?” he asks.

“Cramp”, says the head.

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Q : What is the difference between a woman and a postage stamp ??

A :One is female ; Other is mail fee.

Did you hear that Chelsea Clinton is sueing Monica Lewinsky?

Chelsea is claiming that Monica swallowed her brother!!