Jokes News

MONDAY

8:00 Husseinfeld

8:30 Mad About Everything

9:00 Suddenly Sanctions

9:30 Allah McBeal

TUESDAY

8:00 Wheel of MisFortune and Terror

8:30 The Price is Right if Saddam Says its Right

9:00 Children are Forbidden to Say The Darndest Things

9:30 Iraq’s Funniest Public Execution Bloopers

WEDNESDAY

8:00 Buffy the Yankee Imperialist Dog Slayer

8:30 Diagnosis: Heresy

9:00 Just Shoot Me

9:30 Veilwatch

THURSDAY

8:00 Mahatma Loves Chachi

8:30 M*U*S*T*A*S*H

9:00 Veronica’s Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless Dresses

9:30 My Two Baghdads

FRIDAY

8:00 Judge Saddam

8:30 Captured Iranian Soldiers Say The Darndest Things

9:00 Achmed’s Creek

9:30 No-witness News

Why did the immigrant only tie one shoe?

Cause in the inside of the shoe it read Taiwan…..

A porter, loaded down with suitcases, followed the couple to the airline check-in counter. As they approached the line, the husband glanced at the pile of luggage and said to his wife, “Why didn’t you bring the piano, too?”

“Are you trying to be funny?” she replied.

“No” he sighed, forlornly. “I left the tickets on it.”

There once once a girl from Samoa
Who plugged up her cunt with a boa
This strange contraceptive
Was very deceptive
To all but the spermatazoa

Alice was becoming frustrated by her husband’s insistence that they make love in the dark. Hoping to free him of his
inhibitions, she flipped on her reading lamp one passionate night — only to find a cucumber in his hand.

“Is THIS”, she asked, pointing to the vegetable, “what you’ve been using on me for the last 5 years?”

“Honey, let me explain…”

“Why, you sneaky bastard!” she screamed. “You impotent son of a -”

“Speaking of sneaky,” her husband interjected, “maybe you’d
like to explain our three kids.”

Husband- We really got to get rid of it.It’s old and smelly.

Wife- Yah,it takes up a lot of room in the house and it’s scaring the kids.

Husband- So its settled were getting rid of it.

Wife- Yup.

Husband- I’ll go get the car ready,you go get it.

Wife- Grandpa get ready were going for a ride!!!!!